Personal Share: Healthy Amount of Skepticism.

The Universe is vast and almost unknowable. There are billions of planets around billions of stars. It all had to start somewhere, right? It is sheer folly to think we’re it when it comes to life in the Universe. It is ridiculous to think there aren’t forces at work outside of what our five paltry human senses can detect.

Possibly the toughest part of being open minded is hearing things you know you don’t agree with.

And what’s really rough is when they turn out to be true. I’ve been listening to this very wise person named Andey Fellowes. @andeyfellowes on Instagram. He’s a skeptic when it comes to “New Age” beliefs and the more esoteric end of spirituality. He’s also a pro at debunking a lot of Law of Attraction myths and bringing logic to a space where it’s not as common.

Andey Fellowes. Brilliant guy! https://andeyfellowes.wordpress.com/

Andey Fellowes has made many good points on Instagram, YouTube and elsewhere.

Fellowes has been through a lot of junk in his life. He’s a cult survivor, specifically Teal Swan’s Tribe. He regularly calls Teal’s teachings into question along with those of Ralph Smart and several others. He also suffers from depression, the same as many of us have. He’s also come back to spirituality after being an atheist.

I’ve called some of Ralph Smart’s rhetoric and background into question in the past as well. Most of it has been taken down off of YouTube and Instagram. Fellowes has also called Aaron Doughty and other LoA YouTubers into question and for good reasons. I think this is what has been missing for a long time from a lot of the spiritual/self growth/LoA community that I have been listening to.

I don’t agree with everything he says, which I’m sure he would be the first to say is a good thing.

I’m still very “New Age-y” in my beliefs and practices, although I’ve begun to question some things after listening to Fellowes. I still listen to Lori Ladd, The Ninth Dimensional Arcturian Council via Daniel Scranton, The Spirit of the Cosmos, and others regularly. Anna Brown is still one of my heroes. I’m still very much a fan of Aaron Doughty and Jake Ducey. Honestly, I’ll never abandon my friend Laura DiBenedetto and the Six Habits no matter what anyone says.

But here’s the thing- I don’t believe everything anyone says without question. Laura DiBenedetto will be the first to tell you, I ask a LOT of questions. (LOL! True story.) I never blindly follow any one spiritual teacher. That’s cult behavior and we don’t follow that around here.

But I will say I’ve learned a lot listening to Fellowes. He’s put a different spin on things and said a lot of things out loud that I’ve often wondered about. I’ve learned a lot and I’ve begun to look at certain teachings more critically. However, all it does sometimes is strengthen my resolve and belief in Law of Attraction. Freedom, prosperity and joy are all possible and attainable.

What if Light Language is just gibberish? What if channeling is all just psychological? What if a lot of spiritual teachers just use a lot of colorful language and pseudoscience metaphors to push their products and services? Are we ruled by material capitalism and the almighty dollar?

What good is faith if we don’t question it occasionally?

Skepticism is healthy.

I acknowledge The Ninth Dimensional Arcturian Council is kind of a running joke around here. When I started listening to Fellowes, my wife got all hopeful that I had abandoned my spirituality in favor of cold, hard, logical cynicism. Alas, I haven’t and I won’t. My wife can call me crazy all she wants. We’re still married.

The Universe is vast and almost unknowable. There are billions of planets around billions of stars. It all had to start somewhere, right? It is sheer folly to think we’re it when it comes to life in the Universe. It is ridiculous to think there aren’t forces at work outside of what our five paltry human senses can detect.

To doubt is human. Please don’t ever take the word of any one teacher, guru or expert as pure truth. Please explore, doubt and challenge everything. It’s your sovereign right to do so. But, please- never take any one word for all of it?

Let’s talk Ufology again for a second.

Please come get me? Any time. Please do it in broad daylight so everyone can witness it. Proof is a good thing!

I have had multiple tests of faith over the last year or so. One of the biggest was the whole disaster surrounding Añjali. While I won’t get into my opinion of her here, she is part of the reason I changed this blog and my focus onto other endeavours for a while. But I’m still very interested in the topics of extraterrestrials/extradimensional beings, which by default plays into Ufology.

What I don’t buy into any more is this whole notion of Disclosure. Yeah, the governments of the world lie to us like we’re all stupid. Añjali and another known shill, Lue Elizondo, exist to perpetuate the myth. Many agents working for the government and black budget secret access projects have been sent to infiltrate the Ufology and spiritual communities to spy on us and spread misinformation for decades now. I suspect 1952 was the year that all began in earnest.

The fact that there are hundreds (or more) of beings watching and sometimes interacting with humans is being covered up. Send MIB to my house. Go on. I’ll wait. The truth is, they won’t. I have no proof. All I can do is speculate and ask others to do the same. But I know in my heart, these beings, in whatever form they take, (angels, spirits/ghosts, ETs, and so on) have been around for centuries and aren’t going anywhere.

How do I know?

Peace.

I believe. I don’t exactly know. That’s where skeptics come in. They call those beliefs into question.

If God/Source/Universe is real, then why not beings we can’t see or touch with our little 3D bodies? Who’s to say there isn’t some truth to all myths about the Universe? How does one explain events from history and religion since time immemorial?

Science fact, history, and faith all intersect at certain points. Yes, we can explain away miracles. We can dismiss UFO encounters and ET experiences. Sure, let’s try to thoroughly debunk various “pseudoscientific” studies such as the famous double slit experiment and Masaru Emoto’s study on water. What if it’s all legit?

At some point, humankind must choose what to believe and disbelieve. Skepticism can help us maintain balance. Yes. Please do call things into question. If the beliefs end up being false, then so be it. If I’m wrong, I’m willing to admit it. What if we’re trying to dismiss things that actually do exist?

But if I’m right, it all plays out according to the Universal Laws and everything happens for a reason. Multiple timelines do exist. Beings of every sort imaginable are visiting this planet and watching from the moon. The Law of Attraction really can benefit us in theory as well as practice. There really is no such thing as coincidence. Believe. There is one true Source of all life in the Universe and it wants us to know it’s real!

The best part is, no one has to agree with me. Please, make up your own mind. Believe what you wish to believe.

Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate you. Have a great weekend.

Day 20: Dream

The internet has long been my vision board. This is how I picture retirement, some day after the kids have all graduated.

#FlashFicFeb although this is only “fiction” because I’m not presently experiencing this reality in a purely physical sense.

Day 20: Dream #FlashFicFeb

Photo by Taryn Elliott on Pexels.com

I intend to live in a cabin; near a lake; in the woods; with a view of the mountains; where I can sit in a hand built wooden chair next to a stone fire pit where I cook many delicious meals. I will befriend as many animals as I can. I will walk around the lake at least once per day.

I want to be within an hour’s walking distance of a small town. Other than electrical and water, my cabin will be mostly off the grid. I only need to go into town to use the WiFi occasionally and buy supplies. I might get one of those fancy recumbent tricycles if I get tired of walking. My car is going to be parked and probably covered most of the time.

I want to enjoy fresh air at night outdoors as often as possible. I want to watch the sun rise and set next to the lake. I’ll watch the geese and the ducks come and go. With some luck I’ll even get to see the deer occasionally, and maybe a raccoon. I don’t hunt or fish anymore, so they have nothing to fear from me.

I might become more of a vegetarian than I am now. I plan to make pizza, chili, maybe some eggs now and then. I’ll roast corn, zucchini, potatoes, and onions over the fire pit. I’ll pop popcorn in a pan. I can’t go fully vegan because I love cheese, eggs, and butter too much.

My days will be filled with writing roleplaying games and novels. My weekends will be filled with conventions for roleplaying games or Ufology. I’ll never need to go on a spiritual retreat because the cabin will be far enough from traffic that I can rest and meditate without noise from traffic or other nearby houses.

I want to be able to fall asleep occasionally in my chair next to the fire pit with a blanket over my legs for added warmth. I’ll meditate regularly in almost any weather. My cabin will have a solid roof and a wood stove for cold, rainy nights.

I might get a cat for company. Otherwise, I don’t really need or even want a lot of companionship. I’ll still upload my blog. I’ll e-publish most of my stuff, anyway. It’s not that I don’t like being around people, I just want as much peace and quiet as possible.

Don’t pinch me. I don’t want to wake up. This is real for me.

Photo by Spencer Selover on Pexels.com

Freedom Day! February 2020 v2.0 Edition

It’s going to get better. One of the toughest lessons in Law of Attraction is learning when the Universe is testing us. Also, learning from past experiences that keep repeating themselves is important. The Universe likes to ask, “Are you sure? Are you really ready for this awesomesauce thing you’ve been manifesting?”

I only wish I was kidding.

No surprises, really.

Remember the year 2020? Have any of us forgotten it yet? So far, this year is starting to remind me of 2020 in all of its shitastic glory.

I’ve reviewed, revised and rewritten this site. That’s as close to a breakthrough as I’ve truly had this year. I feel like we’re connecting more, reaching you, a more receptive audience, and growing together.

Then there’s the rest. The Icky Cough-Coughs came to visit in the middle of January and ate up two weeks of our lives here at the Craigmile house. It was not fun times. All of us came through it okay, which is a huge plus. Just when ya thought you were done with quarantine, though. (Eyeroll.)

The beginning of the year also brought us Governor Kim Reynolds meddling about in Iowa Workforce Development. Iowa has a massive shortage of “skilled” jobs, but nothing requiring a college degree. Nothing like a Bachelor’s degree in two majors just to have IWD tell me they’ll be happy to retrain my fibromyalgia-having ass to become an arc welder or a dental hygienist. (That shit ain’t happening.) But I still persevered through all the added hoops necessary to keep my unemployment check coming.

Then this week, I got shot down for a job I really had my sights set on. That hit right in the old depression, worse than anything in months. While I was recovering from that and a pain flare, I got a love letter in the mail from IWD. My unemployment money is due to peter out this week. We knew this day would come, but it doesn’t take the sting out of it.

Plus a lot of little things keep popping up like the kids’ grades. Minor household disasters are one of the latest things on the shit list. (Okay, a chunk of our garage literally fell off the other day.) Just for fun, I accidentally chipped a tooth the other day, too. One of these days my student loans are going to come due.

Let’s not forget it’s also an election year. Russia and the US are doing their damnedest to not go to war with one another or however that works. Let’s not forget the trucking, uh disaster, in Canada. The mass news media has more garbage and propaganda than ever to spew. I wasn’t even going to touch on this, but it does come up around here occasionally. Every once in a while my wife also goes rant mode over something a school board does any given place in the US. This whole book banning/burning thing makes me ill.

Chillin. Waitin for things to improve.

It’s going to get better. One of the toughest lessons in Law of Attraction is learning when the Universe is testing us. Also, learning from past experiences that keep repeating themselves is important. The Universe likes to ask, “Are you sure? Are you really ready for this awesomesauce thing you’ve been manifesting?”

My answer is always, “Give me a couple million dollars and let’s find out, okay?”

Hasn’t happened yet, but any day now. Right? (Nervous chuckle.) Until it does, or something equally wonderful, I have gratitude for the blessings in my life. I am grateful for new friends, especially on #TTRPGTwitter. I’m also grateful for my Earthly teachers new and old. I’m grateful for the wealth and prosperity that flows into our lives easily, endlessly and copiously every day. It’s the whole notion of living in the dream fulfilled.

The dream shifts and evolves.

Maybe this is why my vision board is not posted anywhere but in my head and on the internet. My big dream is to be a successful RPG writer/game designer. I intend for my kids to be well taken care-of. I want my wife to be happy. I’m pretty satisfied as long as all of that is in motion.

Would I love to be rich? Sure. Am I focused on being happy regardless? Yeah. Most days. Growing beyond contentment into joy is the pinnacle of high vibrations. As we all know from LoA, high vibration pulls us closer to manifesting our highest and best intentions.

I appreciate all of you. Thank you for sharing this space. More to come.

Anxiety and How I Beat It Back

What’s the BEST that can happen?

Kind of a personal share today.

My chest is getting a bit tight just thinking about all this. Breathe…

I’m working on a couple of projects that I’m very excited about or at least I should be. I’m sworn to secrecy, so I can’t say what they are, but they’re very important to me. It’s also very exciting.

That’s all fine and well, but the old sinking feelings set in. I start asking all the wrong questions in my head. What if I fail? What if I miss my deadline? What if no one likes it? What if my wife gets on me for spending more time on this than housework or finding a “real” job. What if I’m successful? Ooh pressure… What if there’s criticism? See also all of my personal PTSD triggers…

If anyone needs me, I’ll be curled up under my desk.

Procrastination sets in. I start spending way more time on social media. I play Diablo 3 like it’s going out of style. I do housework until my body says “no more.” The cats are avoiding me because of too many snuggles. Time to be my own therapist for a change. None of this pattern is new to me. Time to break the cycle.

What’s the BEST that can happen?

The worst case scenario has had enough time in the limelight to last me a lifetime. I took Public Relations in college. I know how it works. But I’m done with thinking about what could go wrong. Let’s project what it looks like when things go right.

  • Use positive affirmations to build confidence back up. If nothing else, I am okay.
  • Speak it into existence with gratitude for what will happen. “I am so happy and grateful now that I am a successfully published RPG writer.”
  • Take inspired action. Don’t let those good ideas sit on the shelf.
  • “Lean into the suck.” (Thanks Laura DiBenedetto!) More on that below.
  • False Evidence Appearing Real. Let the demons go on a diet. No more fear.
  • Stay calm. Relax. Breathe. Stay present in the moment. Every now moment.
  • Get knocked down 99 times. Stand up 100 times. Failure is part of the process.
  • Do not compare oneself to the images on social media. The grass is always greener in someone else’s front yard.
  • Finally, criticism is also part of the process. Trust that it isn’t personal. Learn. Grow from it. Keep going with the knowledge that change and growth go hand in hand.

A good friend of mine once said, “Lean into the suck.”

Yes, there’s stress. But…

Yes, there’s going to be stress. It’s part of the process. Yes, there are challenges to overcome. If it were totally easy, someone else would have done it by now. Sometimes, you just have to push through all the fear, stress, concerns and challenges to come out on top in that place of gratitude. Even Elon Musk and Jeff Besos have off days and problems to solve.

Inspired action is still action and sometimes that comes with more challenges (or consequences.) I know I have to step out of my comfort zone. I have to reach for those goals. They’re not just going to happen magically while I sit on my couch and meditate. (Yay meditation, but still…)

Yeah, sometimes things are going to suck. There are setbacks. They’re not permanent. Hold my Dr Pepper. I got this.

I have to constantly remind myself I am NOT my feelings.

Sure, I have feelings. (My man card is burning. LOL!) The thing we tend to forget is that we choose our feelings. I’m not in any imminent danger of being eaten by a bear, so I can choose something besides stress.

Yeah, criticism is likely. But my editor is human. I’m still going to put my best foot forward and do my utmost to meet deadline. If it’s not perfect, we’ll figure it out together.

I am not my diagnosis of PTSD, ADHD, depression, anxiety disorder or anything else psychology labels me as having. I am capable of staying positive and present. I can do this. I’ve got this.

Thanks for bearing with me on a personal share. Sometimes I just need to put it down in words to feel my way through things. The interweb is my vision board.

I am so grateful for all of you. Be back soon.

If you’re interested in more life changing suggestions for personal growth, you can check out The Six Habits by Laura DiBenedetto. This book and its author have helped me so much these last three years.

Leaving a Legacy?

While I don’t have my whole spiritual mission mapped out and I’m certainly no millionaire LoA guru yet, some of the various puzzle pieces of life are falling into place.

Tonight’s theme is: Tough introspection on my part.

So, I’m sitting here playing my 900th+ match on Fortnite tonight and I started thinking. What kind of legacy am I leaving behind? I mean, they don’t have to carve my bearded face into a stone somewhere. I’ve never been big on glory and prestige or popularity. But, what do I want to be remembered for.

Sound like a mid-life crisis?

Photo by Kevin Bidwell on Pexels.com

Yeah, kinda does. In my defense, I do turn 50 next year. Not sure I expected to make it this far. I mean, yay! But at the same time I’m wondering what the last 50 years truly netted me. I’ve had some pretty epic, killer matches in video games going back all the way to the Atari 2600. Yeah… Combat, Pac-Man, and Dig-Dug. I put in a lot of hours on some of those games. Yars Revenge, too. There was a game…

The Basic Nintendo Entertainment System is still one of my all time favorite gaming platforms. I think I played Top Gun, Double Dragon 1,2, and 3 until I beat them and could practically do it in my sleep. There was this really sweet, sweet game called Conflict that I was super pro at. By current graphics standards, these games are all weak sauce now, though.

PC games became my jam in college. I played Mechwarrior, Unreal Tournament, Doom, all of the Dungeons & Dragons content I could find, Command & Conquer (all up until Red Alert 2 or 3, (I think?) Jagged Alliance 2, Squad Leader, and the best of all- World of Warcraft. I played WoW until my arthritis started acting up. Lots of amazing years and fun characters in that game. I still have fond memories.

Oh how video games have evolved.

Alas, I gave most of it up when I became more serious about my spiritual path.

I would like to say I moved on, but not entirely. I still squeeze in an appearance on Heroes of the Storm occasionally. I started playing Fortnite as a way to bond with my kids. They like to watch those YouTubers who scream and yell at the camera all the time. The game is super easy for us old Unreal Tournament guys. We get to spend some time together and it’s fun. I also get to vent some aggression without anyone getting hurt in the real world.

The one thing I will say has changed is I no longer play super obsessively like I did in the good old WoW days. No joke, I went through about seven or eight years where all I did was eat, sleep, work, and play WoW. Sound familiar? It sunk in one summer night after I watched Dr Steven Greer’s Unacknowledged. Where was I going?

Where am I going?

Photo by Polina Tankilevitch on Pexels.com

Again, I’m not out to be a name in every other household around the world, fun though that would be. But I started to realize there had to be more to life than just eat, sleep, work, raise kids and play video games. It started to look like a slow trudge toward the grave, and I’ve never been a fan of that.

That’s when I started to realize that video games are my particular drug of choice when it comes to distracting myself and seriously procrastinating. After some therapy and learning about the wonders of the Law of Attraction, I figured out that video games were preventing all of that “shadow work” and keeping me stuck in old paradigms on top of being a distraction and a means of procrastination. It’s what I do when the anxiety and depression really kick in.

So while I don’t have my whole spiritual mission mapped out and I’m certainly no millionaire LoA guru yet, some of the various puzzle pieces of life are falling into place. Yes, I can still play a round or two of something now and then without blowing a pile of money or losing hours of productivity. It’s a simple matter of moderation and that’s a good life lesson for all the kids, YouTubers and just people out there. If I feel like I’m spending too much time in video game land, I put the controller down.

“If you were going to be rich, you’d have done it by now.” – My mentor.

Someone taught me JOY is the key!

I would take a real bullet for the beautiful, talented, amazing, inspiring person who said this to me. But also, that particular comment still makes me want to crawl in a hole and die. As intensely dualistic as it is, I’m glad she said it. It’s the truth and we should never, ever demand a retraction for something that is legitimate truth.

I hear it a LOT in LoA and entrepreneurship circles. They say you should spend every waking hour of the day on the grind of either self-improvement or pursuing all of your super serious intentions. Is it true? Well, I’ll say it never hurt anyone. Or does it?

Where’s the joy in constantly having your nose in a book or hustling for that almighty dollar all the time? How much fun are you having when you bury yourself in perpetually trying to one-up your perceived competition or hitting the next benchmark? Sure, who doesn’t want to be rich? Yay hustle and grind. Here’s my “but:” Why should a bunch of screaming YouTubers who play Minecraft and Fortnite non-stop for days get to have all the fun and my kids’ undivided attention? Who’s to say self-improvement can’t become someone’s narcotic of choice, a haven for burying one’s feelings?

Their way isn’t necessarily my way.

Money is a good thing, but it’s not everything.

*Note, I’m going to name drop a bunch of folks here. Please go look them up on YouTube if you haven’t seen them already.

I admire Aaron Doughty, Jake Ducey, and even Master Sri Akarshana beyond words. They’ve worked hard in their respective LoA niches and have risen to staggering heights of wealth and prestige in the spiritual and LoA communities. I would love to have a sit-down with Jake Ducey some time. He’s one of my real heroes.

They’ve worked hard on themselves, meditated, prayed, and built empires. I might not always agree with Master Akarshana’s style or tactics, but I admire anyone who straight up attracted a Lamborghini and has businesses running in the thousands if not millions. Obviously he didn’t make all that by playing WoW nonstop to level cap every time a new expansion came out.

However, their way isn’t my way. Sure, I like to live in the feeling of the dream fulfilled. I like to tend to business and work hard, but I also do kick back and have some fun with the kids now and then. I also find writing quite therapeutic, especially these days. I still meditate about once per day. I’d do the same thing if I was Eckhart Tolle or Teal Swan. (Although I might not look as good as Teal. Lol!) My point is, I affirm and believe that I’m on my way up. I may be pulling an Abraham Hicks at the rate I’m going- retired and attracting more and more joy into my life. But that’s another story entirely.

They say before enlightenment you chop wood and haul water. After enlightenment you chop wood and haul water. I figure being a millionaire is much the same, just different trappings. You still have to work, but the paradigm and the type of work shifts dramatically.

My kids like to watch Preston Playz, Unspeakable Gaming and Ssundee on a pretty much daily basis. I hear names like Dream and SniperWolf getting thrown around a lot, too. These folks on YouTube make buckets upon buckets of money and have millions of subscribers. I can admire that. Some of these folks don’t just yell at the mic and play video games all day, either. They give away boatloads of cash and help build businesses and they’re all fairly young. I admire that, but again, it’s not really my jam. I’m a player, not a code guy. I can’t make the next Super Nuke Thrower Bow in Minecraft. I’m not God’s gift to Fortnite.

I pry myself away from the PC and the console occasionally and do other things. Hooray for doing what you enjoy for a living. I love that they do it. But again, I wonder what else goes on in their day. Are they really enjoying life and all the money/prestige? I know 2020 was a good year for certain YouTubers. Yay. But I wonder what life is like outside of the box? Are they fulfilled? Where’s the joy? What are they leaving behind for their kids?

Photo by Adam Fejes on Pexels.com
I’m considering YouTube again, too.

Where does that leave me?

This blog will be around for a while yet. That’s a good start. I have a TON of ideas I’d like to develop once I have some funds rolling in. I’m perpetually learning and improving myself, just not obsessively. I’m really loving life, trying to keep my vibration high within reason, and looking for new opportunities whenever I can. Yes, I do some of my more grindy thinking when I’m immersed in Heroes of the Storm for 20 minutes or playing solo on Fortnite.

Tabletop Role Playing Games are sort of my side hustle. I would love to be the next Gary Gygax or even Matt Mercer. That having been said, I’ve got a TON of ideas. I know how to format, edit, write and create game mechanics that work. Characters are no problem. Art on the other hand… We have challenges to overcome in terms of art.

Have a great week. Keep on doing what lights you up. Keep your vibration way high. Take care. Publius.

The Work Ethic

I’m starting to sound like the LoA and spiritual folk that I used to rail so hard against just a few short years ago. The ones who regularly encouraged people to quit their jobs? Ya know, those people? I used to go off on them. Now I just want to give everyone a hug and thank them for their patience.

Coming up on a month off work. It’s been interesting. I’m not panicked like I would be normally.

To be brutally honest, I’m not in a hurry to get back to the regular 9-5 grind. Yes, it goes against the stereotypical midwestern Iowa work ethic. No, I’m really not too worried about it.

For the first time ever, I’m going against the grain of the old tried-and-true paradigm of “You gotta work hard every day if you want to succeed in life.”

That tired and blue, worn out, broken old paradigm just needs to be put out to pasture somewhere because it’s bullshit. Pretty sure a bunch of my extended family are rolling over in the grave fast enough to warm the ground above them now. But it’s true. Yes, I know how it sounds.

But here’s why: We were put on this 3D Earth to experience life, not grind away on the same tired old redundant stuff one day after the next until we finally die. Oh, and make sure to get married and have a family as to best pass on the redundant boredom.

Someone is probably saying, “But that’s just lazy. Stop and smell the flowers for a minute and get back to work, deadbeat.”

Please do what you need to do to stay in abundance. And don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Umm… No. I’m going to avoid going back to a 9-5 day job for as long as I freakin can. (My wife will likely have a conniption of some sort if she reads this. Sorry, Hon.) I just can’t see forcing myself into that old work-a-day grind at this point.

I’m starting to sound like the LoA and spiritual folk that I used to rail so hard against just a few short years ago. The ones who regularly encouraged people to quit their jobs? Ya know, those people? I used to go off on them. Now I just want to give everyone a hug and thank them for their patience.

I always have to add the caveat that if you’re working 9-5 at a job you’re happy in, that’s great for you. Please continue doing so. Yes, make responsible life decisions. Please take care of your family and loved ones the best you can. That’s awesome. Definitely keep that up.

Sounds like I’m becoming a deadbeat communist hippie or something. I still have a family to support. I’m not giving up on business and commerce completely. I just don’t want to go about it in the traditional way. And no, I don’t 100% beyond a doubt have a plan laid out just yet. I just know that the old ways are not for me.

I think a lot of creative people hit the point I’ve reached recently.

I’ve read a lot of work from various entrepreneurs, creatives and self starters with a common theme. In fact, it’s the one I’ve already shared. They got tired of the old paradigm. They got tired of the old 9-5 trap and were not satisfied with it. They started to groove to their own jams. They checked out of the old system. That’s where I strongly feel I am right now. That pinnacle moment where the old has to go and the new needs to be ushered in.

It’s not even that I don’t want to “work hard.”

I will sorta go back on something I said earlier. I want to work hard.

BUT… not just to put more money in someone else’s pockets. Especially not the pockets of some big, slimy, greedy, money-grubbing corporate McShmucks. Never again. Ever. They don’t deserve the time of day. Sorry if I offend.

I mean, I’ll bend over backwards for myself, my family, my clients (if I’m ever so blessed,) even strangers if they need some help. But I’ll be damned if I’m ever going to grind away day after dragging day ever again. If I’m not enthusiastic about what I’m doing, if I have to put on my “game face” just to go to work in the morning- I’m not doing it.

Do I hate money and those who have it?

Yeah. Hi.

Hello. Have we met? If you’ve been reading my blog, you already know what I’m going to say about that. If this is your first time here, welcome. If you’re just scanning my posts looking for something to hold against me, this is a good time to question your ethical compass and why you’re really reading this.

I love money! I love the things it can do for me. I want to feed and educate my kids, keep the lights on, keep my laptop and phone somewhat up to date. I love clothes, books, polyhedral dice and trips. At the beginning I did say we’re here to experience life. Money helps with that. Yay!

And I never begrudge anyone for making money. If you’re the CEO of Giant McMegacorp, good for you. Glad you got where you are. Hope that’s working out well. If you’re a multi-millionaire investor in real estate or some other high finance operation, good for you!

Now, I will say, somewhat contradictorily, that I will take issue if you treat people like dirt. If you’re filthy stinking rich of the blood and tears of others and continue to act like a dictatorial turd, then I will call you out. If you regularly treat your employees like crap and blame them for your perceived failings, we have issues. If your workplace is giving the appearance of thriving on toxic positivity and other ultimately destructive practices, I will shame you to the Nth degree possible.

But even on my worst day since learning about prosperity and the Law of Attraction, have I ever said, “Grr, rich people are bad.”

I mean, for crying out loud. I want to be rich. I’m just going to be super fussy about how I go about it. Believe me, I have an ethical code. Actually, it’s fairly strict. If I can’t go about something the way I think it should be done, I just won’t go about it.

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You just don’t know how to handle money, so you could never be rich.

Bet me. Give me a million or even two million dollars and I’ll put it to work for both of us. Just because I’m not a millionaire now, doesn’t mean I can’t think like one. I’ve done the mindset work. I get what needs to be done. I’ll be grateful and overjoyed for every cent I have every day in every way.

Younger me did not understand a lot of the things I understand today. That’s my answer to why I haven’t done it already. If I had known then what I know how, this would be a different conversation entirely. Hearing abundance LoA talk from a millionaire is a lot different from hearing it coming from me today.

My plan is to take care of basic needs, build, grow, and be as loving and charitable in between as humanly possible. I truly want to give to people, communities, and family as much as possible. My ego is out to prove it can be done with a vengeance. The rest of me just desires peace and prosperity above all else.

Until next time, keep looking up. Be good to one another. Take care.

Staying in Abundance

Humanity and I are going to keep on striving for a better day tomorrow and the day after.

It’s easy to slip back into a lack mentality, especially when times get tough.

A lot of Law of Attraction gurus have covered this, so I won’t go overboard explaining every nuance, but this came up in my life recently. It’s almost a daily occurrence right now in my own mind, though. Adapting to new life circumstances or we’ll say different now moments has been a challenge at times.

How do you keep up the mental walls of positive thinking when it looks like everything has fallen apart? Some would put it more pragmatically and say, “face reality,” but I find reality as we understand it to be a very fluid concept. It’s almost like a line from Eminem’s “Lose Yourself.” I’ve been presented with a grand opportunity, and I’m super determined not to let it slip away. Or to quote Eminem, “You’ve got to lose yourself in this music, this moment… You only get one shot. This is your chance blow…”

Only this is Craigmile, not 8 Mile. Opportunity is infinite like everything else in the Universe. It’s another cliché, but when one door closes, another opens. I believe Source is constantly testing to see what we’re ready for, then presenting it, then challenging, and so on ad infinitum. It’s a constant cycle of sureness. Sometimes it appears as adversity. Other times it appears as triumph.

Aren’t we just lying to ourselves? Spiritually bypassing?

The Six Habits

Laughably, no. And allow me to elaborate. I find there are a few keys to coping with a change in circumstances without bogging down into that old lack mentality. My three favorites are acceptance, gratitude, and presence. And if this sounds like Laura Dibenedetto’s The Six Habits, you’re absolutely correct. BUT… It’s also taken from other brilliant minds such as Alan Watts, Bob Proctor, Jake Ducey, Sri Akarshana, Aaron Doughty, Ralph Smart, Abraham Hicks, and so many more.

If I were bypassing, I could just bury my head in the sand and try to meditate my way out of this whole situation. Instead, I’ve chosen accept the things I cannot change. I have recited the Serenity Prayer over and over during the last two weeks. One thing I’ve noticed people tend to forget, however is we live in a Universe where there are no victims. Yes, it’s hard to swallow, but everything is a matter of choices. My choices are going to lead me to better and better places.

Mentally, it’s hard for the ego to let go of the “this sucks” notion. It can leave one ranting like an insane person, walking about the house muttering, arguing with oneself about circumstances vs ideals. Without bypassing, being delusional, you have to live in the present as if it were the ideal that you desire. I think it was Alan Watts that talked about being homeless, but mentally constructing your mansion as if you were living there. You have to know every detail as if you were remembering it. Scripting is important, but so are intent and action.

How do you keep from letting your circumstances get to you?

It’s easy to say, “This sucks. I can’t cope. It’s so unfair that -blah- happened.” Instead of complaining and hating on circumstances, I find it easier to focus on the things we have to be grateful for. Now, my list literally grows by the day, some old favorites and some new items. I am happy to be free. I am overjoyed to be my own boss. I am so happy and grateful I finally have some real time on my hands to do some writing. I am so happy and grateful people are reading this right now. I’m grateful I get to be here with Gaia right now. The list can just go on and on…

I am happy and grateful I still have a roof over my head, good food to eat, and my family is happy and healthy. Truthfully, if that’s all I ever manage to manifest in my life, that is awesome. That’s not to brag, either. Plenty of people out there are hurting in one of those categories of more. But humanity and I are going to keep on striving for a better day tomorrow and the day after. It’s not always easy, but it’s always manageable. My advice if you’re struggling- believe in your heart of hearts that it’s going to get better.

I don’t drink alcohol, smoke anything, vape anything, do “recreational drugs” or anything else to try to escape. If I had to pick a soothing behavior, it would be video games and even that is becoming more manageable by the day. My other main hobby is tabletop role-playing games, but that is becoming more of a side hustle and possibly my main hustle eventually.

But if I’ve learned anything over the past few years of taking in LoA teachings on a daily basis, it’s that I never have to completely trudge around in the muck. Sure, there are things I’m going to do, maybe not today, but eventually. My wife and I discuss the grocery budget almost every day. Our kids drink milk like little calicos in June around here. We’d love to eat out more. But we’re going to make due with what we have whether it’s a little or a lot. I’m leaning toward a lot. We’re going to make it happen.

What keeps you focused?

There are two things I’d like to attribute to my success and sometimes failures with LoA. The first is mindset. It took a very long time to rewire my brain. (Somewhere I hear Jake Ducey and a couple of other folks laughing at me.) But it’s so true. You have to turn that minus – into a plus + every day. That line in the middle of the plus sign goes from the bottom up. Sure, I have negative thoughts. It’s gonna happen. The faster you catch it and wire in something more positive, the better.

Some people like to do it subliminally or through hypnosis. I’ve done some of that myself. It works, but you also have to believe. Taking time every day to script either in writing, verbally or even just as a regular thought exercise might seem silly and tedious in the short run, but over days and weeks, it starts to sink in. Daily affirmations do help quite a bit.

Sure, I still get triggered by something silly or take a hit to my self esteem occasionally. The most important thing is not to dwell on it for too long. Psychology plays a major role in spirituality and LoA. We all argue with that little voice in the back of our minds from time to time. It’s called an ego. It’s there to protect us. It can be a big helper when you need it. Other times, you just have to tell the little bugger to sit down and shut up. Sometimes your heart, your gut, and your third eye will get you places that obnoxious ego won’t get you to.

Yes, I DO recommend meditation.

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The best way to be in the presence of God is to pray or meditate every day. I sometimes do both and then some. Regardless of your religious beliefs or practices, just sitting in silence for a few minutes every day can really help you reign in your focus.

I can’t stress enough that it’s not hard. When I meditate, I don’t have any special pose or seated position beyond sitting down, eyes closed, no distractions, palms up (but that’s personal to me.) Relax, be in stillness, and let go of your thoughts for a while. Don’t worry. Don’t think about anything. Just BE. Even if it’s just sitting outside for 10 minutes and observing nature. Some people meditate while walking.

Shaolin monks take it to the extreme in a way. I remember one student saying “Everything we do is meditation. When we punch, we are doing punching meditation. When we kick, we are doing kicking meditation.” Singular focus is key. Pretty soon, if you practice mindfulness long enough, you start picking up on patterns and seeing the world in a whole new light.

Eckhart Tolle explains that meditation itself is not about doing something. It is simply a matter of BE-ing. You have to train your mind to rest and just let the Universe flow though you. That’s when you are in presence the most. There is no trick, posture, pose or plan to get there. It’s a state of being, but does it ever help with the rest of the day.

So, <POOF> I meditated and it’s all better?

Alas, it is not all about meditation. Seriously, if it were that easy to cast a money spell just through meditation, wouldn’t we all do it? Zero point energy, wealth, food and well being for every creature on Earth would have happened a thousand times over and we wouldn’t need to be here if it were that easy. This is the hardest part of LoA for both myself and most people- you have to take what is called, “Inspired Action.” When opportunities present themselves, and they often do, you have to be ready to pounce. For example, if you get offered a new job, and your gut says “yes,” then you have to pounce on it.

I look for new and more opportunities all the time. Being more present and mindful will help you see that when it comes up. In kinda New Age terms you’re collecting your energy and focusing it on that which you intend and the proper time to make it happen. Again, not as easy as it sounds. Ever see a Shaolin monk punch something? Punching meditation. He’s literally pulling energy from the Universe and channeling it through his fist and through the target. It’s all one motion for them.

On a final note, I believe in second, third, and more chances. We ultimately live in a kind, loving Universe. We are beings of love and light. God does not exist to punish us. In my opinion, the Kingdom of Heaven is truly within. If you screw up, like I do, The Universe will put something else in your path. You will attract something new, possibly better than you would have expected.

In the end, the most important thing you can manifest on this Earth is joy. It’s also the easiest. Find one thing to smile about. Find something, even if it’s small, to take some happiness in. Even if you’ve been standing in swamp water up to your chest for two and a half days, as long as you find something to laugh about, you’re going to be okay. Love? Be happy for yourself and your partner. Money? Be happy for however much you have and you’re going to have. Career? Be happy you get to go to work every day in a place you want to be in.

Til next time, stay safe and smile!

Monetization Quandary

I feel very strongly that lifting the collective consciousness is a not-for-profit industry.

Hello Family!

I recently had a discussion with a friend of mine over the topic of crowdfunding. It’s really got me thinking about how and what to do with it. Okay, a little Law of Attraction talk for a minute- I love prosperity! I love money! I am overflowing with the infinite abundance of God’s wealth! I AM a money magnet! Ah, there. Got that all off my chest. If Jake Ducey ever reads this, I hope I made him proud by stealing some of his quotes.

But that is kind of true. I love money. I would love to have more. Do you know all the cool happy fun things money can do? Feed the homeless. Plant trees. Buy gifts for orphans. Help my children to pursue their dreams. But here’s the kicker- Do you really need ME for that? I mean, if you’ve got money to give away, you can easily do that and more.

I’m into LoA to get rich, yes. Among so many other things that would make me smile. And this is not an article where I plan to do any debunking of LoA, although that day may well come. Raise your vibration super high. Super cool things come to you. Pleasant, positive things find their way into my field when I’m in the flow state. No doubt.

You’re probably wondering where all this is going by now. Truthfully, I hope I never make any money from you unless I’m doing something to earn it. I’m not on my spiritual path to make a quick buck. Truthfully, I cringe every time I really enjoy listening to someone’s content on Instagram or YouTube, but then they have to drop the sales pitch for their course, meditation, cult-like Patreon community, or whatever. I mean, yay for them.

Here’s the thing- I’m not here to say “Money is bad.” Quite the opposite. I love money. If you make money selling a book, course, meditations, reiki, or whatever you’re doing, that’s great. If you’re an award winning success coach, life mentor or spiritual guru, that’s great. Good for you. It’s not a competition. I’m not in it to win it from you. I’ll celebrate your success. Cool.

Not me. I’m not on the spiritual path toward more money. When I “awoke” and saw what’s really going on out there in the world, I started asking, “What the actual f*ck is wrong with some of these people?” And I truthfully have two or three WTAF moments every day. And I don’t just mean people sponging money off of the New Age spiritual crowd. I mean, in general. Sometimes it seems like the closer one is to the top of the elite 1% that control so much and have so much wealth, the more likely something is seriously wrong with them. Things I don’t even want to think about, ever. Yeesh.

So, I’m not here to get rich off of spiritual folk. I’m not here to try to get rich off of the UFO crowd, or ET experiencers. I don’t want to make a dime talking about mental health, spiritual beliefs, or anything of the sort. (If my wife reads this, she’s probably cringing right now…)

I could be homeless and living under a bridge for that. The Universe will always provide. Believe and you will receive. Right? Let’s hope so. But I feel very strongly that lifting the collective consciousness is a not-for-profit industry.

More to come on this. It’s a topic I feel very strongly about. I’ve seen so many people doing it the way I have sworn not to do it. But, seriously, why? Are you about love and light or credit and debit?

Gratitude for the Storm

I AM GRATEFUL FOR: The dedicated people who worked super hard to clean up this mess. Having refrigeration. An opportunity to clean out my fridge. Air conditioning. Trees. Wind. Rain. Fresh Salads. Warm Pizza. Popcorn. Time with the kids. Having everyone safe after a weather disaster. Having a car that runs. Being able to charge all of our various electronics. A chance to get my wiring projects caught up in the house. (Power was out, so may as well, right?) Cold beverages.

I apologize for having to take a couple of days off. We had some really severe storms roll across the state of Iowa three days ago that wiped out our electricity until a few short hours ago. This whole near-disaster was a lesson in gratitude, appreciation, acceptance and love. Oddly enough, I’m actually happier tonight than I was before this thing hit.

Another thing that belayed my posting is my bosses were “sitting in” with us. All it really meant was a lot of long, very boring meetings about the stock market and why we should watch it. Which is hilariously pointless given I work overnight and it has absosmurfly nothing to do with our jobs. And even more ironic given that they’ve already said they’re cutting our jobs. I think they’re just trying to figure out which ones they want to keep. (Like it’s not already bloody obvious?) Again, I’m just laughing at the whole stupid thing. But in the interest of decorum, I tried to stay somewhat present and not post from work.

So, two nights of working with the clown and pony show followed by two days of coming home and trying to sleep with no air conditioning. I stayed surprisingly calm and centered through the whole experience. Our power came back on and my family was super excited. I’m just as calm as I was when it went off. Why?

Again, I’ve been practicing Presence. It’s one of the Six Habits created by Laura DiBenedetto. I know I shamelessly plug the book and the program a lot, but it has done wonders for my state of mind and spiritual well-being. This latest disaster is another example. I’ve really been digging back into my habits lately.

The other morning I noticed how quiet it was. Now, my neighbor’s genny ran non-stop, plus all the chainsaws and traffic out there along with the occasional police/fire sirens. How is this quiet?

Simple. No TV, no Internet, no phone (trying to save on the battery,) and the kids weren’t all up yet. I would bet 200 years ago, this site I’m living on would have been beyond peaceful. As it is now, just listening out the window is pure joy. Even tonight as I listen to traffic and crickets. It’s easy listening for the quiet mind.

I want to end this post with a gratitude list. I won’t go into all 25, but just the highlights I have realized over the last few days.

I AM GRATEFUL FOR: The dedicated people who worked super hard to clean up this mess. Having refrigeration. An opportunity to clean out my fridge. Air conditioning. Trees. Wind. Rain. Fresh Salads. Warm Pizza. Popcorn. Time with the kids. Having everyone safe after a weather disaster. Having a car that runs. Being able to charge all of our various electronics. A chance to get my wiring projects caught up in the house. (Power was out, so may as well, right?) Cold beverages. Last for now, Gaia. And God.

As I’ve been saying, Gaia smacked us and God saved us. That’s pretty much what happened. But the greatest gift from ALL of it, are the lessons learned and gifts we can appreciate. So, thank you, Universe, for again showing us all the marvelous experiences we can have here on Earth. Thank you!

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