Anxiety and How I Beat It Back

What’s the BEST that can happen?

Kind of a personal share today.

My chest is getting a bit tight just thinking about all this. Breathe…

I’m working on a couple of projects that I’m very excited about or at least I should be. I’m sworn to secrecy, so I can’t say what they are, but they’re very important to me. It’s also very exciting.

That’s all fine and well, but the old sinking feelings set in. I start asking all the wrong questions in my head. What if I fail? What if I miss my deadline? What if no one likes it? What if my wife gets on me for spending more time on this than housework or finding a “real” job. What if I’m successful? Ooh pressure… What if there’s criticism? See also all of my personal PTSD triggers…

If anyone needs me, I’ll be curled up under my desk.

Procrastination sets in. I start spending way more time on social media. I play Diablo 3 like it’s going out of style. I do housework until my body says “no more.” The cats are avoiding me because of too many snuggles. Time to be my own therapist for a change. None of this pattern is new to me. Time to break the cycle.

What’s the BEST that can happen?

The worst case scenario has had enough time in the limelight to last me a lifetime. I took Public Relations in college. I know how it works. But I’m done with thinking about what could go wrong. Let’s project what it looks like when things go right.

  • Use positive affirmations to build confidence back up. If nothing else, I am okay.
  • Speak it into existence with gratitude for what will happen. “I am so happy and grateful now that I am a successfully published RPG writer.”
  • Take inspired action. Don’t let those good ideas sit on the shelf.
  • “Lean into the suck.” (Thanks Laura DiBenedetto!) More on that below.
  • False Evidence Appearing Real. Let the demons go on a diet. No more fear.
  • Stay calm. Relax. Breathe. Stay present in the moment. Every now moment.
  • Get knocked down 99 times. Stand up 100 times. Failure is part of the process.
  • Do not compare oneself to the images on social media. The grass is always greener in someone else’s front yard.
  • Finally, criticism is also part of the process. Trust that it isn’t personal. Learn. Grow from it. Keep going with the knowledge that change and growth go hand in hand.

A good friend of mine once said, “Lean into the suck.”

Yes, there’s stress. But…

Yes, there’s going to be stress. It’s part of the process. Yes, there are challenges to overcome. If it were totally easy, someone else would have done it by now. Sometimes, you just have to push through all the fear, stress, concerns and challenges to come out on top in that place of gratitude. Even Elon Musk and Jeff Besos have off days and problems to solve.

Inspired action is still action and sometimes that comes with more challenges (or consequences.) I know I have to step out of my comfort zone. I have to reach for those goals. They’re not just going to happen magically while I sit on my couch and meditate. (Yay meditation, but still…)

Yeah, sometimes things are going to suck. There are setbacks. They’re not permanent. Hold my Dr Pepper. I got this.

I have to constantly remind myself I am NOT my feelings.

Sure, I have feelings. (My man card is burning. LOL!) The thing we tend to forget is that we choose our feelings. I’m not in any imminent danger of being eaten by a bear, so I can choose something besides stress.

Yeah, criticism is likely. But my editor is human. I’m still going to put my best foot forward and do my utmost to meet deadline. If it’s not perfect, we’ll figure it out together.

I am not my diagnosis of PTSD, ADHD, depression, anxiety disorder or anything else psychology labels me as having. I am capable of staying positive and present. I can do this. I’ve got this.

Thanks for bearing with me on a personal share. Sometimes I just need to put it down in words to feel my way through things. The interweb is my vision board.

I am so grateful for all of you. Be back soon.

If you’re interested in more life changing suggestions for personal growth, you can check out The Six Habits by Laura DiBenedetto. This book and its author have helped me so much these last three years.

Freedom Day, DECember Edition

https://ko-fi.com/jeffcraigmile

Hard to believe it’s December already.

Christmas is right around the corner. I’m still without any kind of meaningful employment if anyone was wondering. Not that I’m bitter, but more on that in a moment. I have started an account on Ko-Fi if you want to buy me a cup of coffee or contribute to my kids’ college funds.

My Ko-Fi Can be Found Here:
https://ko-fi.com/jeffcraigmile

I really do.

I want to share some love with the people who have been here for me through the year. It’s been…

Good at times. We’ve experienced some real abundance. I’ve felt the “Flow” at times as we say in Law of Attraction circles. I’m going to drop a ton of Instagram links below in a movie-credit style roll for those interested in making new friends. It’s been a good year, in many respects.

Then there was the not-as-amazing stuff. Being unemployed is a blessing and a curse. (Again, more on that later.) Our health held up. Our roof stayed attached through all of the wind storms. Christmas is looking very bright this year. We’re still kicking butt as a single income house so far. Ya know, I keep coming up with all these things to be grateful for, almost like my Higher Self is showing me what to say?

Like, maybe you can’t be super high vibe all the time, but the lows aren’t so low, either. I will honestly say, I’ve had some struggles with depression, anxiety, anger, and pain this year. Depression and pain being the absolute worst of it, but I’ve managed to pull through. The valleys aren’t as deep any more and the hills aren’t as tough to climb.

Okay, taking a minute to spit a little anger at a few groups, because duality exists.

First, I’d like to put a big middle finger in the air up to corporate America. I especially have a mean-on for one specific industry that I can’t mention here for the potential of getting sued. But let’s just say it doesn’t bode well for any of the suit-n-tie-wearing, bottom-line-toting, conference-room-team-meeting, SMART-goal-fucking, overinflated, top-heavy, corporate McAssholes of the world when you treat people like absolute shit and then get around to firing them. In an ironic twist, I hear people are leaving some of those corporate jobs in droves because of shitastic working conditions and poor treatment by management, anyway. Good for them!

Second, another KissMyAss award goes out to #ufotwitter. Yes. You’ve earned it. Stop being pompous, overinflated egoic, know-it-all naysayers who allow no one a differing opinion or outlook. For people fighting for Disclosure and want to “believe” in ETs, UFOs, UAPs or whatever you’re calling them this week? Y’all got a funny way of showing it. Probably because you know the minute meaningful ET contact is made or Disclosure ends publicly, you’re going to have to shut up and your book deal will be gone. Meanwhile, all the government funded disinformation agents and shills out there are finally going to be out of their jobs, too. But, take heart. I hear Iowa Workforce Development will retrain you as an arc welder or dental hygienist for free.

Third, the State of Iowa could sink into the center of the Earth any day now for what it’s worth. Hopefully they can build bridges to connect other states over the crater. We’ll probably find some way to blame the Governor Kim Reaper for it. Our Cov-Icky-Cough-Coughs numbers are higher than most Third World Nations and our employment outlook is horrible. Iowa Workfarce Enforcement only cares about one set of uneducated-but-skilled laborers. If you have a college degree, get ready to step down and take it in the butt or go without a job. But if you’re fresh out of high school or suddenly disillusioned with UFOlogy and can follow instructions like a good little drone, they want you.

A Couple of Other Thoughts While We’re Here.

COVID… I’ve seen so much freakin rhetoric about vax vs anti-vax and mask vs anti-mask. And again, see that bright red state in the middle of the map with the outrageous uptick in reported outbreaks? Yeah… Get your shots or don’t. Wear a mask or don’t. Make the decision for yourself. Just stop talking about it, please. Save our sanity.

Mainstream Media- I have a journalism degree for cryin out loud. (Not that it’s ever made a huge difference.) You know what one of the first things I cut out of my life right after I graduated was? Watching any kind of news broadcast or reading any news outside of the occasional YouTube video or article from an independent website. Even then, I take a lot of it with a grain of salt. Please, do yourselves a favor this holiday season and in life and turn the TV off, stop listening to the bobble headed idiots on morning radio, put the newspaper down, and go outside for some fresh air. Screw politics. To Hell with what the Kardashians are doing now. Fuck COVID. Let the Chinese do whatever they’re going to do today. Ignore Trump entirely. Just go get some fresh air and appreciate the world around you. You’re gonna be so much better off for it.

Let’s talk about that whole “being unemployed” thing for a few.

This is not a dis on people with jobs. We all gotta do what we gotta do. Love ya for it.

Personally, if I never set foot in an office again to work, it’s not gonna hurt my feelings. I’m productive from right here at home. Yes, I’m struggling right now because no one sees my value. I can write. I know I can. I have yet to land a writing gig. Yes, I know what’s on my résumé It says I’ve been beaten more times than your college baseball team. But it doesn’t say a thing about me or what I’m capable of. Iowa Workless Defamation doesn’t see it. The locals aren’t hiring for anything I want to do and finding a remote job is like… Geez, I can’t even come up with a good comparison any more because it pretty much sucks!

Yes, I would love to have a “career” again. Quite honestly, being a stay-at-home dad is starting to feel a little like freeloading. This is not exactly fulfilling my life purpose or seeing my mission as a lightworker out, but it’s not horrible, either. I would love to be bringing in some money for roof repairs, a new vacuum cleaner, or whatever else comes up next. I mean, four kids. It’s always something.

LOL! Did I mention that Ko-Fi link? https://ko-fi.com/jeffcraigmile

People whom I wish to give much credit this year. Thank you friends, family, and Earthly teachers:

First Off, Thank you Heather Craigmile, loving wife and mother of our four kids. (No links.) She’s shy. Sorry folks.

Here’s a list of some of my friends on Instagram in no particular order:

  • Laura DiBenedetto: @lauraldibenedetto
  • Shane: @thespiritofthecosmos
  • Sharon: @candidly_sharonh
  • Andrea Garris: @a.l.garris
  • Dr Julia Colangelo @drjuliacolangelo
  • Alana Weinberg: @healwithalana

I had to leave a few people off for privacy reasons. And if I left you off, please know I still love you! Thank you!

Already?!?

God bless my wife for keeping the family going. Thank you, Heather, if you see this, for putting up with my antics for this long. You deserve a medal.

It’s the 19th already?!? Where does the time go?

This might be my last post on this blog. I haven’t fully decided yet. I guess I’ll let you know. It’s Freedom Day for me. It’s been four months since I had a “real” job.

God bless my wife for keeping the family going. Thank you, Heather, if you see this, for putting up with my antics for this long. You deserve a medal.

Time to get a little more vulnerable than usual. It’s been a rough month for me emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Let me try to put this together in a way that will make sense. Please pardon my ramble in advance.

To the handful of people that read this, I thank you. You are truly appreciated.

Me.

This blog has been a kind of learning lab for me. Figuring out what to do, what not to do, and what all is possible. It’s been a labor of love. But I’m here to tell ya, family- this last month has really made me question a good number of things in my life.

First setback of the month was:

Let’s start at the top with the Añjali debacle. She announced that the Mojave expedition is permanently on hold due to the health concerns of the man who owns the land that the tunnel to the underground base sits on. It was a huge disappointment for some and an even bigger I-told-ya-so for the asinine turds of #ufotwitter. I guess yay for them, but it’s a huge setback for some of us.

It’s big old double whammy for those of us in the UFO and Spiritual communities. I mean I’ve been called a “New Ager woo-woo freak” by the nuts-and-bolts guys before because I’m spiritually active and listen to channelers, CE-5, meditate regularly, and so on. I really think someone should unite the communities. Añjali could have been that link, but too many people were protecting their vested interests and cash cows to listen. So, any credibility some of us freaks had in the UFO world is more disrupted than ever. ETs could land on my front lawn complete with video and #ufotwitter would say it was fake.

Añjali wasn’t necessarily the great white hope. We knew there was a possibility that she could be involved in a psyop to discredit, dismantle, and disrupt both the Ufology and spiritual communities. Personally, I don’t think she is, but I acknowledge that it’s possible. Then again, Lue Elizondo could be doing the same thing and there are plenty of people eating right out of his proverbial hands, too. I’ve said on Twitter and elsewhere that Añjali should have gone to the experiencer/contactee or spiritual channeling communities with her information instead of UFO (a$$holes) Twitter. But hey, like so many others, she shut me down and refuses to answer my Direct Messages. Again, the skeptic in me sees a false flag operation, but who knows…

It was NaNoWriMo Month again, too.

I’m unemployed. Technically every month could/should be NaNoWriMo. Family support is important if you intend to bang out an entire book in one month. I have five other people and three cats that all need love and attention on any given day so it just didn’t come together. I may actually start a novel yet this month, but there’s no pressure, no writing buddies, or any of the usual NaNo flair. It’ll be okay.

Found me a new community.

My English teachers and editors would be losing their ever loving minds over that header, but whatever. I have gone back into my #ttrpg roots, and that may be what this blog changes over to soon. Again, I guess we’ll see. I kinda like having a place for personal shares, but I have only this humble paid-for space and I would really love the Premium package for my gaming ventures. TTRPG stands for TableTop RolePlaying Games, for those who don’t know.

So, yeah, as I’ve mentioned before, I’m a huge Dungeons and Dragons fan and have been pretty much my whole life. I started gaming back in the early 1980’s and have been at it for almost 40 years. But it’s always been a hobby and a writing venture. I have yet to sell anything in the industry. I’ve worked in game stores. I’ve sold a lot of games over the years. But, always a bridesmaid, so to speak.

That brings us to the next point.

I’ve had to spend lots of meaningful time with my friends at Iowa Workforce Development this month to ensure my unemployment check didn’t get cut off completely. I’ve gotten to attend all kinds of fun meetings to make sure I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing. I guess that’s what they get paid the big bucks for, but at the same time, they’re not actually doing anything for me, aside from my unemployment check.

I also got an anonymous message from a former co-worker with a juicy tidbit that confirmed some of my suspicions. I wish I could say a LOT more without jeopardizing my severance and NDAs, but I can’t. Somebody should, though. To quote the Matrix, Cypher told Morpheus “If you’d told us the truth, we would’ve told you to shove that red pill right up your ass.” That’s true of my severance package, but my family needed the money, so it’s a tough choice and I ultimately made the right decision.

That said, my job search has thus far been a running joke with me. Honestly, if I never work a “real job” again, it’ll be too soon. I like being my own boss, setting my own hours, and giving myself a pat on the back for being my employee of the month. Unfortunately, IWD has a hard time seeing this. They have an obvious agenda. I’m not part of that equation.

They told us in one of their little “classes” that they want people to fill what they refer to as the “middle skills” roles. In other words, they want people who have completed high school, but haven’t been to college. They want dental hygienists, welders, truck drivers and nurses. Do I fit that description? Hell no! Do I want to take a pay cut and do something I’m going to be absolutely miserable doing? F*ck No!!! I will literally embrace homelessness for myself (and only myself) before I will ever go back to the 9-5 grind doing something just for the sake of doing it.

And they keep trying to tell us “Oh, it’s so meaningful. So many people find their life purpose doing this…” No. No, people really don’t find it meaningful or fulfilling. In fact, it makes me sick to my stomach to hear the IWD people rattle on about fulfilling it is to sleep, eat, work, repeat and how everything else is just a fun hobby. Again, I get that it’s what they’re paid to do, but it’s not an enlightened, spiritually aware thing to do.

My whole resume is disgustingly full of the kinds of jobs they’re talking about. No offense to anyone, but I think I’d rather die than go back to just about any of those jobs. The pay is mediocre. The hours are long and unfulfilling. There is no appreciation from management most of the time. The benefits are crappy. Worst of all, my health will not support that kind of work ever again in an office or any other environment.

Lol! This is getting long. To be continued…

Oh Freedom Day!

I AM realistic. I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES!!!

I’ve been liberated from the grind of 12 hour work days for three months!

I want to preface this with the thought: Be responsible! Don’t do anything rash on account of what somebody on the Internet said. I wouldn’t be here right now were it not for the kindness and understanding of my family. For that I am extremely grateful.

If you’re working hard to keep food on the table, keep going. You got this!

Things I’m grateful for since freedom came to me:

  • I’m my own boss and my own employee of the month.
  • Freedom from McCorporate Team environment.
  • The slow 12 hour workday trudge to the grave is no more.
  • Time for my family.
  • Time for my own health and sanity.
  • Setting my own schedule.
  • Deciding my own fate over putting money in their pockets.

Hallelujah! I am so happy and grateful to be free on this day! This is proof that the Law of Attraction really does work. It’s not always easy or painless, but it does come together in its own special way. We live in a benevolent Universe. I believe in good things and they are there for me. I AM realistic. I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES!!!

I’ve worked toward manifesting this moment right here, right now. I’m my own boss, working my own hours, reporting to me. I’m my own employee of the month. This guy is truly moving onward and upward. I give me all kinds of praise and good reviews. Gotta keep that vibration up, though.

My Chairman of the Board. Taken from my mobile office/studio. I love this guy!

I’m so happy and grateful to be free from the corporate environment. If that’s your thing, great. You do that. Me? I’m my own boss. Technically still unemployed by the current socioeconomic cultural matrix standards, but that’s their label, not mine. I find things that are awesome about me.

It’s like finding inner peace on a whole new level. I set my own standards for success. I’m happy being me. It’s beautiful. There’s no one breathing down my neck. There are no performance “SMART” goals. No upper-middle-lower management clowns to bug me. No one setting standards they can’t meet themselves. My life is beautiful now that the greasy corporate mentality is all washed out of my system. I only get on my own case if I need to, and I’m learning to be more gentle with myself.

Teams? I’m it. It’s just me. The whole corporate team concept is broken. I’ve seen it fall apart or just plain fail for over 20 years now. You have a group of five to ten employees (sorry, “teammates” because we can’t just call people what they are) sitting around a table, forced to make small talk and participate in fakey fake team-building exercises that no one truly enjoys, and then one or two people end up doing any real work. It’s sad. I’m so happy and grateful to be a one man show.

I’m going to do a whole article on why the team thing doesn’t work. I’ve always had problems with it as a sociologist. It looks great on paper, but then you come out here in the real world and well, it looked great on paper.

Photo by Vinta Supply Co. | NYC on Pexels.com

I’m so happy and grateful to be free of “the trudge.” I report to me, on my time, and I love it! I know I say it a lot. Before I started working toward manifesting my dreams, it was a long, slow, painful, miserable, insufferable trudge toward the grave. Every day and night looked the same. Now every day- Every. Single. Day. is an adventure! Sometimes it’s just a nap with the cats or sitting on the couch while scarfing junk food and playing video games, but I’m allowed some free time. I’m excited to wake up in the morning. It’s genuine.

Time for my family is very important to me and I am grateful now that I have more of it. I missed out on over a decade with my three older boys while I was working nights. I’m happy to be free to take them to school, pick them up, and just spend some quiet time with them. I see more of my wife now. I’m happy to be supportive on the home front.

Time for my own health and sanity is so amazing now! I suffered so much at my last job, I mean truly suffered, that I put myself back in therapy. I’m still dealing with some psychological junk in the trunk, sure. I still have chronic pain, arthritis, fibromyalgia, and depression issues. Sure. that’s the tired old labels talking. Here’s the kicker- I’m healing. I don’t have to rush out the door after barely having enough time to eat, sleep, shower, and maybe wave at my family on the way by. I’m here to tell you, being free is its own reward.

I get to decide when I eat, work, even nap now. My wife is about the only person who gets to object to anything, and she’s pretty cool about my schedule most days. Thanks, Honey!

It might not make sense to a lot of people. Many do work weird rotating 4 x 12 hour nights or some other freaky calendar nightmare. We can still exchange knowing looks. Working oddball, non-nine-to-five hours really can take a toll on one’s sanity. I’m glad to be free. I’m still and always will be a Nocturnal American, though.

I’m looking at NaNoWriMo next month as a serious possibility. Pretty sure I can hit word counts and page goals per day and then some. It’s just so nice to be able to sit down and work on things without all the pressure. My wife might roll her eyes, but I can make it work. It’s ideal this year, really. You’ll know if I go quiet for all of November.

No longer getting up every day to put money in the pockets of people who don’t care about anyone else.

If I do anything now, it puts money in MY pocket. I love helping people out, sure. That’s what we’re here for. But the thing I’m absolutely loving more than words can tell is that I’m no longer subjected to artificial concepts like sales goals, target savings goals, and other artificial standards that all translate to putting money in some executive’s pockets. Seriously, why bust my hump every night, just so the company I’m working for can outsource everything from custodians to human resources in the name of saving money.

You know who profits from the toils of corporate employees? Corporate executives. These people are no different than anyone else except for the fact that they got a slap on the back and a handshake that put them in a corner office. We no longer live in a world where you work your way to the top from the ground floor. (Not sure if that ever really existed.) These managers and executives don’t care if one of their cubicle inmates works hard or knows what they’re doing. It’s all about the bottom line.

Here’s the kicker- Entrepreneurs worry about their own bottom line. That’s were I am today. That’s the threshold I’m presently standing on. It’s exciting! I’m a writer first and foremost now. The whole profits-before-people thing is dead to me now.

I encourage writers, artists, musicians, dancers and anyone else with a dream to shed the corporate grind and go have a free life. Yes. Be responsible. Take care of yourself and your family first. But beyond that? Please go on out and live your dream life!

Create the life you want to life!

Thank you for being here. Stay safe. See you again soon.

CO-Vid. I’m Over It.

Beloved family, make your own decisions based on the information you receive and what you believe in the most.

Here’s an article I’d been putting off.

Are we all tired of the Icky Cough-Coughs yet?

In spiritual and conspiracy circles, I hear A LOT of talk about Covid-19. On a daily basis, I even see folks in the world of Ufology talking about it. Well, not the disease specifically, because ya know- we’re not doctors, nurses, virologists, biologists, zoologists… one of the thousands of people actually qualified to talk about the Icky Cough-Coughs. (That’s the name my 14 year old gave it to make it sound like Doc McStuffins.)

Btw, I haven’t been sick. Knock on wood. This has been one of the healthiest years of my life. It has a lot to do with the fact that I’ve sequestered myself at home for a lot of it whenever possible. I rarely leave the house except for work (when I was still doing that.) Now? Good luck prying me out of the house for anything short of food, money, or nature.

It’s a disease in the real world as far as I can tell. How severe it can be, as far as we know is fatal. A couple of older folks who lived down the street from it died early on during the event. The nastiness itself has gotten all kinds of names such as the “Plandemic” or “Scamdemic,” and others. We’ve seen all kinds of predictions surrounding this thing, many of which have not come true.

It’s not the zombie virus of Z Nation fame. It hasn’t wiped half the planet as of August 2021. It also hasn’t dried up and vanished completely, lovely though that would be. The economy is still plodding along, with small businesses struggling more than large, slimy corporations. Some big, slimy corporations have even profited considerably from this. (Mask sales have gone up how much percent compared to two years ago? Yeah…)

We’ve had our shots. Well, some of us have. Maybe not everyone. We’ve spent more time indoors with family and pets. We got to know our political leaders’ characters better than ever for better or worse. All around, as experiences go, it hasn’t been… well, it’s been okay for some. 2020 was still the Earth went haywire. (Sounds like a 1950’s B movie title.) But, for the most part we’re still here. Life goes on for 7.8? billion of us.

I saved this from my Instagram feed. News to me.
Notice it said “Liked.”

Jeff, why are people getting banned on social media for talking about the Icky Cough-Coughs?

Because it’s still a touchy subject for big, slimy corporations and world governments. Not to go all David Icke, but well, there might be a bigger agenda that doesn’t want all us regular folk talking about their plans for world domination. (Sounds like a plot for a James Bond movie. Lol!)

Most of the people I see getting hit with the “misleading information” ban hammer are talking about one of about three things. It’s either masks, vaccinations, or the disease itself while not being medically qualified. Also, Facebook and others don’t like being called out on their nonsense and their paid fact checkers (who work FOR Facebook) will get (sometimes petty) revenge.

These Earth-shattering events were brought to you by: The Interweb and other Mass Media. Part of the trauma from any major issues these days is caused or aided by global mass telecommunications. Back in ye olden days the mass media acted as gatekeepers of information. Now, instead of one person getting information via a train of witness/official source-reporter-editor-broadcast source it just goes witness -> world. This means we’re all reporters and there really are no editors when it comes to getting news now. We are literally finding out what’s going on in the world from the people it effects as fast as videos can upload and messages can send.

The only real gatekeepers for information, aside from the governments of certain countries blocking the internet, are the mass media corporations themselves. This is a blessing and a curse because one should probably ask “Who watches the watchers?”

So if the Zuck-Blofeld Media Syndicate* wants you kept quiet, well… they probably will. See my other rants about censorship and secrecy elsewhere. It gets discussed frequently.

Here’s why I’m here writing about this today:

You have to do what you feel is best for YOU. Get your shots. Don’t get your shots. Wear a mask or two or three. Or don’t wear a mask. Beloved family, make your own decisions based on the information you receive and what you believe in the most. That’s all there is to it in the end. Please be a sovereign being. My point is, I can’t tell you what you should do and neither should anyone else.

The best is still on the horizon.

Other centuries and other epochs have survived plagues worse than this.

I have a somewhat similar view of the phenomena in Ufology. Seriously, dreadful diseases are nothing new historically. Someday, probably sooner rather than later, Covid is going to be right up there with Spanish Flu (Influenza A,) Rubella, Mumps, Whooping Cough, or the Bubonic Plague. This pandemic too, shall pass. The world will move on and any day now the mass media/powers that be will come up with the next newest, biggest, scariest thing on Earth for us to be afraid of.

We’re getting though this, together. The same way ascension is coming, we’re all going to make it through kicking and screaming. We’re all going as one big, happy collective of love and light, whether we want to or not. The progression of linear time moves on regardless of struggle and toil. Sol still rises and sets. Gaia keeps on turning and dancing through the Universe.

Stay safe. Take care. See you soon.

*Zuck-Blofeld Media Syndicate is a name I made up. No real big, slimy corporations were called out in the making of this blog. #dontsueme

Presence Today

Pets are pros at Presence. Ever just sit and stare at your pet or pet your animal for a long time?

I choose to talk about Presence today. It is one of the Six Habits in Laura DiBenedetto’s book, The Six Habits. If you want to know more about it and would like to read the book, the link for it on Amazon is here: The Six Habits. The audio just came out too, by the way.

Presence is in short, all about mindful presence. Can you be in the room and be fully focused on what is going on in the room? It’s not as easy as one might imagine, especially in these modern times when we have numerous distractions- TV, radio, and the biggest attention-sucker ever- smart phones.

THE SIX HABITS by Laura DiBenedetto
Practical Tools for Bringing Your Dreams to Life.

Then there are the internal distractions. How often do you catch yourself thinking, “I wish I was anywhere but here?” Or my favorite, “I wish I was home right now,” while I’m at work. Sometimes, my mind wanders about 200 miles northwest of my current location, in a nice forested area, with a lake and a view of the mountains, within driving distance of the Pacific Ocean…

But the catch is, can you bring yourself back? Can you be fully on top of your game at work? Can you listen to the kids telling you about some video game character or a YouTuber they’ve discovered? Sometimes it’s hard. My email, especially ads from dice companies, is way more interesting than either thing I just mentioned.

My favorite example was the other day at a restaurant. This woman was at the table across from us with her family of six. My kids know, and my wife is usually aware of the rule, phones get put away at the dinner table. My guess is, the nice lady across from us did not have that rule at her house, or that phone call must’ve been pretty important.

Meanwhile, her husband was trying to wrangle the kids, all of whom were probably 10 and under, squirrelly as most kids are, and wiggling, wriggling and monkeying around as most kids do. The guy looked absolutely miserable. That phone call lasted most of the meal. I’d probably have said something had she been my wife, but… Hopefully they sorted that out afterwards.

Husky pup. Much more adorable than an Excel spreadsheet. I mean, seriously. Please email me for photo credit..

My other example, and this one is purely on me, is work. You think Instagram is far more amusing than my job? Spreadsheets and boring emails vs cute pictures of husky pups, kittens, bunnies, spiritual stuff, conspiracy stuff, and so on… I can get distracted very easily. The trick is coming back to the present moment.

How much more productive am I when I’m fully present? It’s pretty shocking how much I can really get done when I have my eye on the metaphorical ball. Would I rather be blogging? Yeah. Or really doing anything besides pouring over line upon line of dispatches and crunching numbers. UFOs, ETs, and things coming and going from other dimensions are way more entertaining to talk about.

Here’s the best part. Coming back to joy. I mean, if I’m more productive at work, maybe I finally get promoted or a pay increase. That keeps the family happy, right? And failing that, I get all of my actual work done and can dip out for a few and look at the latest dice offers in my personal email. Or, I can get everything set for the night and keep an eye open for driver requests while I write a blog article. Tee heehee. (Not that I ever do that.)

The same is very true at home. If I’m fully centered on my family and listening to them, I hear about their day at school. I hear about how my wife’s work went. (Yeah… the Co-la-ro-lala-nala-vir-usla is a very ugly topic here with teachers in Iowa right now…) I get to actually enjoy dropping some advice or bringing the topic around to something more interesting. Although my family’s thoughts about the Ninth Dimensional Arcturian Council are for another post. But it’s nice being a husband and a dad when life throws me a chance to be both. And there’s plenty of time to hang with the cats and write blog articles afterward. (Grin.)

Have a beautiful now moment.

Photo by James Wheeler on Pexels.com

How to Rebel Energetically (in 2020.)

In my last couple of articles, I covered how I have this sort of existential dissonance going between my own personal code of ethics and this job that I need to feed my family. Now, I could express this as a philosophical or even a straight math equation, but I intend to explain it very plainly.

Photo by Ju00f6rn Sommer on Pexels.com

Family comes first. Then my own physical needs. Then my ethics and spiritual needs third. Although technically the well-being of my family is one of my core values, so we could say I’m still heeding the call. But the two things that still get to me are the fact I’m serving an industry I despise and I’m stuck in a soulless cubicle all night watching my dignity degrade as I pour over spreadsheets and emails for hours.

Let’s make sure to mention service to self and others. It is extremely important. Not only are you keeping yourself happy, loving yourself, taking care of yourself, etc, but you’re taking care of your loved ones, and possibly neighbors and even community as well. Love is a key component to fulfilling one’s purpose. It’s called the language of the Universe. Send those super positive vibrations out there.

Writing, designing this blog and tabletop roleplaying games are my side gigs. Which I fully intend to have become my main focus. I’ve been at this for almost four decades now in one way or another. Yes, they’re fun hobbies but they’re going to become more. Yes I enjoy spending time on all three. Yes, there is “joy” in enjoy. Thank God.

Right there is the answer. Joy. Lots of it. TONS of it! If you want to fight back against the matrix (or whatever you want to call it,) you have to fill your heart with joy and love! Sounds a little silly to those who haven’t been in the spiritual community for long, but I find it to be very true.

Where Attention Goes, Energy Flows.

See, when you focus your attention on what you love doing, your energy goes there. Your vibration goes up, sometimes exponentially. Most importantly your joy comes forth. Joy! Happiness! Joy is one of the greatest energetic expressions in the entire Universe. If you want a systemic combo breaker, that’s it.

If anyone tells you otherwise? Tell them to go jump in the lake (or some other catchy phrase.) Once a person stops conforming to all these rules and norms created by a society, corporation or government who cares not for anyone’s well-being short of their own, it really eats the governing body. It tears at them. They get a little taste of what it’s like to watch their grasp slowly slipping away.

That said, don’t go flipping your boss the bird and laughing your way out of the office just yet, family. Again, the number one priority is greatest and highest good. So, take care of self and family. Still plenty of joy there, undoubtedly, but sometimes you have to keep the thing you despise around just long enough to really dig into the thing you love and find joy. Soon enough joy becomes greater.

Next time around, a discussion of Presence. A challenging habit to master, despite a simple name.

Solo of Fortune

I say I’m just playing the 3D game and it’s going to be overcome.

Was the name of my guild on World of Warcraft. I took a fair amount of grief for that one. It’s no coincidence that it’s tied to Cyberpunk 2020. And again, this isn’t my gamer blog, oddly enough.

A “Solo” is a mercenary, soldier or street samurai who primarily operates on his own or with a small group of people in the Cyberpunk Game. There was actually a supplement for the game called “Solo of Fortune.” I resonate with this as a light warrior, which is just a slightly more aggressive way of saying I’m a lightworker.

Solo of Fortune
Screenshot from Fandom

Please, bear with me. I’m not a violent person. By no means am I advocating violence in the real world with any of this. My goal is to demonstrate my current attitude and outlook on life. Please, for goodness sake- be kind, be gentle, and be nice to one another out there in the real world.

CP2020 is a game. Cyberpunk, specifically “punk” is an attitude. Anyone remember the 80’s? Remember punk rock? Yeah. It’s about being rebellious. It’s about being anti-system and pro freedom. It’s about being very loudly non-conformist. It’s individual expression aimed at the collective. It’s becoming what 2020 is all about. I mean, for real. Look at the news. Look outside.

I hit a dilemma in life, as I said in my last entry. Try to fit in and feed my kids, or shuck the whole thing aside, quit my job, and rebel. It’s burning inside my brain even now. It’s a good thing I love my family more than I hate my job. But mark my words, I’ll be out of that place in a nanosecond if something solid in line with who I really am comes along.

I’m an old Solo. I’m an old warrior who is not done fighting. I don’t fit into a tight little corporate package. Working for the oil industry no less. (Barf!) But- it pays most of the bills. Some people say I’ve sold my soul. I say I’m just playing the 3D game and it’s going to be overcome. It’s all temporary.

Law of Attraction, Law of Vibration, Law of Balance. Universal laws have come into play. I’d say I need a lawyer, but that’s not very ‘punk. I’m a virtual badass armed with everything I’ll every need to navigate the 3D world, and as Ralph Smart would say, “we ain’t even had breakfast yet.” I’m just getting warmed up.

Here’s truly how to beat the system in 2020. Raise your vibration! Raise it so high not a single dark anything can touch you. Find your joy! Find your passion! Live the dream! Live in the vibration of that dream every day and work hard until it becomes the real deal.

More to come on this. A lot more. No quitting. No giving up. And before I start sounding like a pro wrestler, see ya soon.

Took a Few Days Off

I’m going to start talking about some of the things we discussed on there. UFOs, Disclosure, Extraterrestrials, Extradimensional beings, deep esoteric stuff…

Hey. I’m back. Yes, my original goal was to post daily, and we may yet see that happen. But, I took a few days off.

Everything is all right. It wasn’t even a creative slump. It was more of a motivational slump? Hmm. Not sure that’s the term I want.

I took a few days off to question why I do what I do. Am I driving the blog or is it driving me? Do I have to post or do I enjoy posting? Am I saying things in terms of social media or just to get them off my chest?

Let me answer all of that very simply. My blog is about me. I appreciate views. I appreciate likes. Much like Instagram, if you follow me, I’ll follow back. But, this is quite literally my space. My little corner of the web. And I’d like to keep it that way. So, I may go a little bonkers at times.

No kidding, folks. There are going to be some wild days ahead. I try to keep it positive, something I promised myself back in my Blogger days. But I have not begun to turn out the types of articles I had on there.

Photo by Dids on Pexels.com

And I’m going to start talking about some of the things we discussed on there. UFOs, Disclosure, Extraterrestrials, Extradimensional beings, deep esoteric stuff, and even conspiracy theories. While I’m not trying to offend anyone, I’m even going to start talking about the Illuminati again. But, let’s not get all dark and scary, okay?

Photo by Anthony on Pexels.com

II’m even, at my own peril, going to mention the reptilians. It might even be an article this week, yet. It’s a topic most don’t dig up. But I think I have some unique perspectives on the subject.

You can do a little pre-reading here. The Reptilians. I’m no David Icke, but I think there’s a lot of truth in what he’s saying. Others have tried, by the way. Not always successfully.

But, then again, I’m just a humble blogger with a relatively small readership. And that’s cool. Truthfully, I wasn’t entirely sure where I was going with this article. Like many conversations with me out in the physical world, it’s taken a turn off the beaten path.

On that note, have a lovely now moment. I’ll be back soon with lots to discuss. If you have questions, comments, or concerns, you can message me on Instagram @jeffcraigmile or comment below.

Cup Overflowing

I fill my cup with love. My cup overfloweth.

Without getting into a lot of serious details, I had a pretty rough night at work. And I was really upset at the time. I’m down to aggravated, maybe even annoyed now. It’s getting better. (Lol, sorta…)

I sat down to meditate and my guides gave me a few of things to go on. First, it’s all temporary. Everything. Every last minute. There’s better things to spend the energy on.

Second, it’s all about polarity right now. This is just another one of those incidents that is set in motion for a reason, possibly as a test. Then the guides dropped a tough one on me.

“Let go,” they said. “Trust.”

Yeah… Do they know how hard that is?

Last, my guides gave me a mantra to go on throughout the other 30 minutes or so that I was with them in meditation. “I fill my cup with love. My cup overfloweth.” Sounded somewhat Biblical. Wouldn’t be the first time.

But I have said it about a million times in my head now. I’m even smiling when I think of it. I have to believe this has all happened before elsewhere and it will have a happy outcome.

I fill my cup with love. My cup overfloweth.

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