Freedom Day! 11th Month Edition

Our continuing mission to seek out new opportunities, new wealth and prosperity has hit yet more snags. I’ve been off work for 11 months with no prospects for gainful employment in sight. The government is not helping yet or possibly at all. The bills are starting to creep up.

Captain’s Log. Stardate: 6.19.2022.

Our continuing mission to seek out new opportunities, new wealth and prosperity has hit yet more snags. I’ve been off work for 11 months with no prospects for gainful employment in sight. The government is not helping yet or possibly at all. The bills are starting to creep up.

A family of six surviving on one paycheck in this day and age looks pretty grim. Law of Attraction aficionados would say I chose this. Lord knows I have plenty of reasons to be down these days. Guess I’m choosing depression, too. It wouldn’t be so bad if I could just bury my head in the sand and just pretend things were going to improve.

Site engagement has been up.

THANK YOU!

One silver lining this month has been engagement on this site. I saw a couple of beautiful spikes in views earlier this month. Wow! If you’re here, thank you! I appreciate you stopping by.

A lot of the feedback I’ve received from sources such as #ttrpg Twitter has been extremely positive. I’m still somewhat new to blogging and it makes my heart flutter a bit when I hear a compliment. Thank you! Of course, more site traffic isn’t a sign of positive or negative opinions, but I’ll take the up-tick in views. Thank you!

Then there’s a ton of stuff that doesn’t make much sense yet.

I regularly mull over what I’m doing right in terms of writing, parenting, husbanding, adulting, etc. There’s never a super clear answer to any of my questions. It’s not like life comes with a user’s manual. Kinda wish it did some days. (Like, the ones ending in “y.”)

I keep wondering about how to best monetize myself in the roleplaying game market. Kickstarter? Patreon? Maybe just put stuff on Ko-Fi? I’m not sure I’m ready for DriveThruRPG just yet. That would require a finished larger product.

Someone recently mentioned trying out Fiverr. (Coming Soon!) I have often considered doing piece work, short articles, and social media posts. The same wonderful person mentioned possibly doing some ghostwriting or editing. Terrifying, which is why I’m looking into it.

Then again, am I really supposed to be in the RPG market at all? What about writing a novel? (Not as easy as it sounds, btw.) What about life coaching? (LOL! Not sure if I should be coaching or finding one.) What about becoming some sort of spiritual teacher? (*Don’t worry. Andey Fellowes and others would talk me down off that ledge.) What about a self help book? (Uh… 😐)

Figured out what I’m not doing.

That list goes on forever. The most obvious ones include finding another dispatching job. No thanks PTSD. Not today.

Scrubbing floors is right out. Even if my back and pain levels could tolerate it, my wife would likely shoot me. The hours for that kind of work are not worth the pay and effort involved.

Iowa Workforce Development. There’s a reason I’m no longer looking for a job in this state. They were more than happy to help as long as I wasn’t neurodivergent, in pain, and happy to throw my college degree out the window. Iowa needs dental hygienists and welders. Just don’t come around here being one of those sinister teacher types. (*Love you, wife.)

I’m too old and out of shape for retail, restaurants, factories, and office jobs. I have too many values and principles to ever do sales, especially over the phone. Call center jobs tend to become very stressful and triggering about five minutes in. I don’t even think Wal Mart would take me as a door greeter at this point.

In fact, screw working for any kind of big company or corporation ever again. Even if all the corporate culture head trash didn’t make me want to vomit, I’m pretty sure any review I receive is going to trigger me all over the place. That’s assuming we get that far. “Let’s have a meeting” would be followed by me coming completely unglued on someone. No thanks.

Bring my Garden Weasel to work day?

A brilliant and beautiful soul put me onto some new avenues of abundance.

Laura is the best!

I can always count on my friend Laura DiBenedetto to set me straight. She recently clued me into a couple of new avenues to abundance. I’m working on it, but it’s taking a little time. More on that as it develops.

I also continue to practice the skills I learned from The Six Habits. Laura’s book legitimately can and will change your life if you work with it. I may still get down sometimes (depression sucks!) but it’s an ongoing process, much like spiritual awakening.

The human brain creates channels of memory like lava carving its way down the side of a volcano. Practice a habit for 21 days and you can change the channel. Brain cells that fire together wire together. Neuroplasticity can modify those channels to improve your life. Look up Hebb’s Law. A constant practice of Kindness, Acceptance, Gratitude, Presence, Goodness and Intention will yield positive results given enough practice.

I’ve been back into the book lately, myself. Sometimes we get out of practice on certain things. It’s good to go back to basics and remember why we came here.

Gratitude is key.

Okay. I’ll buy that one. I’m so happy and grateful I have a roof over my head and a food on my plate. I’m grateful for all of the wonderful things I have in life. I’m grateful for my family’s health. I’m super extra grateful for my wife’s job. I’m super happy and grateful when I find loose change on the street, too. I’m grateful I met Laura, too.

Gonna go off now…

I’d like to say I’m grateful I got canned from that last gig. Look at all the stuff that’s teaching me. I’m grateful to be walking around with not-two-shits to give about anyone working for a large corporation or what they have to say. I’m grateful Iowa Workforce Development was more than happy to help as long as I did exactly what they wanted me to do. I’m extra grateful the government keeps denying my disability because I love being f’kn broke all the time. I’m grateful every time I log into LinkedIn to find out some other scamtastic pile of refuse has viewed my profile, because it reminds me I’m glad I gave up that damn job search crap months ago.

I know I have some things working against me every day.

Silly “Old Grognard” photo

First up, my age. I turn the big 50 in ten days. Even if I wasn’t long in the beard and bald as a cue ball, my birth certificate does not lie. I could shave tomorrow, but I know in my heart of hearts it will do me no good.

But what does that mean? Why is that so bad? Well, first off, employers really don’t want to see me walk in the door because they know I’m old enough not to take any sh*t that they hand out to the younger new guys.

On every given day, especially now that I’m officially “old,” my health comes into question. Which, I know how much they cringe with FMLA comes up. I literally have no choice but to mention it nowadays. I’m happy to be functional three days out of five most of the time.

My back and my pain tolerance make it pretty hard to do a lot of those fun repetitive motion tasks like mopping floors, scrubbing toilets, running a cash register, stocking shelves, standing all day, and a lot of other things y’all youngins take for granted. In fact, writing is one of the few things I can enjoy doing while sitting down from the comfort of my couch. (Too bad it doesn’t pay better, but we’re working on it.)

As bitterly annoyed as I am becoming toward certain entities, one fact remains prevalent.

No clue wtf I’m doing any more.

I have a family to take care of. That hurts on so many levels I can’t even describe them all. I’m very grateful my wife is taking care of all of us. That’s super.

Sorry, kids. Dad’s kind of a deadbeat. Seriously, I know how it looks. I wish I could provide more. I so desperately want to give more financially. And I live here. Your mom and I are still married somehow.

So, yeah. 11 months into this sh*tshow and I still have more questions than answers. I’m still wrestling with finding myself, accepting my own inadequacies, and fumbling around with what to do. I’m still unable to rub two shince together and have not two sh*ts left to give some days. Improvements are hopefully on the way soon.

Thanks for being here, one and all. I would have liked to have glowing things to say, but it’s been another r month. Onward and upward, I suppose.


Massive Shout Out!

Please don’t just take my word for it! Please go check out her website. I know I sound biased. She’s a world class coach, professional, CEO, and TEDx speaker among other accolades. She’s done so much and helped many people find joy.

Thank you, Laura DiBenedetto!

Not just a friend, but a force of nature!

Almost out of the blue yesterday, I received a couple of LinkedIn notifications. One was a message from Laura and the other was a comment on one of my blog slugs on LinkedIn. I had commented in that article about wanting to make more money and how I’m a bit stymied at present.

Well, long story short, my very good friend Laura put me onto a couple of ideas that I will be developing further in the coming weeks. I want to expand at my own pace in a way that makes sense for me, but at the same time builds up some financial success for my family.

I’m so ridiculously grateful to know Laura and have had the privilege to work for her a little bit. She’s generous to a fault. She’s always been very helpful. There’s no encouragement like Laura’s. And let’s mention jaw-dropping, heart stopping motivation. Seriously, I get all teary-eyed and speechless.

She’s also honest when needed. I can always count on her to make me face reality and set me straight when I’m all over the place. A more true friend I’m not sure I could ask for in this world and I don’t have that many.

I can’t mention Laura without mentioning The Six Habits.

This book can change your life!

LauraDiBenedetto.com
Please don’t just take my word for it! Please go check out her website. I know I sound biased. She’s a world class coach, professional, CEO, and TEDx speaker among other accolades. She’s done so much and helped many people find joy.

I first discovered Laura on Instagram. Her posts are always off the charts cool. I learned a LOT about life, success, joy and spirituality from her. She’s incredibly wise and still learning. As a side note, she’s the only person I know who retired at 37 years young and then got pulled back into a leadership role many times over.

No, it’s not a cult. Just want to put that out there. I know my recent encounters with Andey Fellowes made me really consider that notion and Laura doesn’t tick those boxes. No worries. She’s one of the good ones.

I have, however, discovered many other amazing folks on Instagram as a result. I’ll shout some of those fine folks out in a future article. Laura has a fantastic circle of friends and is so helpful when it comes to networking!

One thing will always blow my mind when it comes to Laura.

She’s very high class. Like, we’re talking she can hang with people who make six digits or more per year. She’s rock star/Hollywood celebrity caliber. (Ammunition pun intended. See one of her newest ventures.) I so totally admire this lady and would gladly follow in her footsteps were that an option.

Alas, I follow in my own footsteps. I can aspire to my own greatness. I owe her that much. Honestly, I’m not sure how the heck I made it from 2019-Present without The Six Habits and some encouragement of my friend. She would likely say that’s the best any of us can do is carve out our own path and find joy for ourselves.

What still blows my mind is the notion that she’s so classy and high powered but still somehow manages to find the time to chat with lil old me out of the blue. Like, wow. Just… wow.

I can’t thank you enough.

THANK YOU, LAURA!

I still contend I owe you like, uh. Okay I lost count. A LOT, okay. I owe you big time! Thanks for being so awesome!

And thank all of you for stopping by. Lots of love and aloha as my friend would say. I appreciate you. More to come.

Anxiety and How I Beat It Back

What’s the BEST that can happen?

Kind of a personal share today.

My chest is getting a bit tight just thinking about all this. Breathe…

I’m working on a couple of projects that I’m very excited about or at least I should be. I’m sworn to secrecy, so I can’t say what they are, but they’re very important to me. It’s also very exciting.

That’s all fine and well, but the old sinking feelings set in. I start asking all the wrong questions in my head. What if I fail? What if I miss my deadline? What if no one likes it? What if my wife gets on me for spending more time on this than housework or finding a “real” job. What if I’m successful? Ooh pressure… What if there’s criticism? See also all of my personal PTSD triggers…

If anyone needs me, I’ll be curled up under my desk.

Procrastination sets in. I start spending way more time on social media. I play Diablo 3 like it’s going out of style. I do housework until my body says “no more.” The cats are avoiding me because of too many snuggles. Time to be my own therapist for a change. None of this pattern is new to me. Time to break the cycle.

What’s the BEST that can happen?

The worst case scenario has had enough time in the limelight to last me a lifetime. I took Public Relations in college. I know how it works. But I’m done with thinking about what could go wrong. Let’s project what it looks like when things go right.

  • Use positive affirmations to build confidence back up. If nothing else, I am okay.
  • Speak it into existence with gratitude for what will happen. “I am so happy and grateful now that I am a successfully published RPG writer.”
  • Take inspired action. Don’t let those good ideas sit on the shelf.
  • “Lean into the suck.” (Thanks Laura DiBenedetto!) More on that below.
  • False Evidence Appearing Real. Let the demons go on a diet. No more fear.
  • Stay calm. Relax. Breathe. Stay present in the moment. Every now moment.
  • Get knocked down 99 times. Stand up 100 times. Failure is part of the process.
  • Do not compare oneself to the images on social media. The grass is always greener in someone else’s front yard.
  • Finally, criticism is also part of the process. Trust that it isn’t personal. Learn. Grow from it. Keep going with the knowledge that change and growth go hand in hand.

A good friend of mine once said, “Lean into the suck.”

Yes, there’s stress. But…

Yes, there’s going to be stress. It’s part of the process. Yes, there are challenges to overcome. If it were totally easy, someone else would have done it by now. Sometimes, you just have to push through all the fear, stress, concerns and challenges to come out on top in that place of gratitude. Even Elon Musk and Jeff Besos have off days and problems to solve.

Inspired action is still action and sometimes that comes with more challenges (or consequences.) I know I have to step out of my comfort zone. I have to reach for those goals. They’re not just going to happen magically while I sit on my couch and meditate. (Yay meditation, but still…)

Yeah, sometimes things are going to suck. There are setbacks. They’re not permanent. Hold my Dr Pepper. I got this.

I have to constantly remind myself I am NOT my feelings.

Sure, I have feelings. (My man card is burning. LOL!) The thing we tend to forget is that we choose our feelings. I’m not in any imminent danger of being eaten by a bear, so I can choose something besides stress.

Yeah, criticism is likely. But my editor is human. I’m still going to put my best foot forward and do my utmost to meet deadline. If it’s not perfect, we’ll figure it out together.

I am not my diagnosis of PTSD, ADHD, depression, anxiety disorder or anything else psychology labels me as having. I am capable of staying positive and present. I can do this. I’ve got this.

Thanks for bearing with me on a personal share. Sometimes I just need to put it down in words to feel my way through things. The interweb is my vision board.

I am so grateful for all of you. Be back soon.

If you’re interested in more life changing suggestions for personal growth, you can check out The Six Habits by Laura DiBenedetto. This book and its author have helped me so much these last three years.

Freedom Day, DECember Edition

https://ko-fi.com/jeffcraigmile

Hard to believe it’s December already.

Christmas is right around the corner. I’m still without any kind of meaningful employment if anyone was wondering. Not that I’m bitter, but more on that in a moment. I have started an account on Ko-Fi if you want to buy me a cup of coffee or contribute to my kids’ college funds.

My Ko-Fi Can be Found Here:
https://ko-fi.com/jeffcraigmile

I really do.

I want to share some love with the people who have been here for me through the year. It’s been…

Good at times. We’ve experienced some real abundance. I’ve felt the “Flow” at times as we say in Law of Attraction circles. I’m going to drop a ton of Instagram links below in a movie-credit style roll for those interested in making new friends. It’s been a good year, in many respects.

Then there was the not-as-amazing stuff. Being unemployed is a blessing and a curse. (Again, more on that later.) Our health held up. Our roof stayed attached through all of the wind storms. Christmas is looking very bright this year. We’re still kicking butt as a single income house so far. Ya know, I keep coming up with all these things to be grateful for, almost like my Higher Self is showing me what to say?

Like, maybe you can’t be super high vibe all the time, but the lows aren’t so low, either. I will honestly say, I’ve had some struggles with depression, anxiety, anger, and pain this year. Depression and pain being the absolute worst of it, but I’ve managed to pull through. The valleys aren’t as deep any more and the hills aren’t as tough to climb.

Okay, taking a minute to spit a little anger at a few groups, because duality exists.

First, I’d like to put a big middle finger in the air up to corporate America. I especially have a mean-on for one specific industry that I can’t mention here for the potential of getting sued. But let’s just say it doesn’t bode well for any of the suit-n-tie-wearing, bottom-line-toting, conference-room-team-meeting, SMART-goal-fucking, overinflated, top-heavy, corporate McAssholes of the world when you treat people like absolute shit and then get around to firing them. In an ironic twist, I hear people are leaving some of those corporate jobs in droves because of shitastic working conditions and poor treatment by management, anyway. Good for them!

Second, another KissMyAss award goes out to #ufotwitter. Yes. You’ve earned it. Stop being pompous, overinflated egoic, know-it-all naysayers who allow no one a differing opinion or outlook. For people fighting for Disclosure and want to “believe” in ETs, UFOs, UAPs or whatever you’re calling them this week? Y’all got a funny way of showing it. Probably because you know the minute meaningful ET contact is made or Disclosure ends publicly, you’re going to have to shut up and your book deal will be gone. Meanwhile, all the government funded disinformation agents and shills out there are finally going to be out of their jobs, too. But, take heart. I hear Iowa Workforce Development will retrain you as an arc welder or dental hygienist for free.

Third, the State of Iowa could sink into the center of the Earth any day now for what it’s worth. Hopefully they can build bridges to connect other states over the crater. We’ll probably find some way to blame the Governor Kim Reaper for it. Our Cov-Icky-Cough-Coughs numbers are higher than most Third World Nations and our employment outlook is horrible. Iowa Workfarce Enforcement only cares about one set of uneducated-but-skilled laborers. If you have a college degree, get ready to step down and take it in the butt or go without a job. But if you’re fresh out of high school or suddenly disillusioned with UFOlogy and can follow instructions like a good little drone, they want you.

A Couple of Other Thoughts While We’re Here.

COVID… I’ve seen so much freakin rhetoric about vax vs anti-vax and mask vs anti-mask. And again, see that bright red state in the middle of the map with the outrageous uptick in reported outbreaks? Yeah… Get your shots or don’t. Wear a mask or don’t. Make the decision for yourself. Just stop talking about it, please. Save our sanity.

Mainstream Media- I have a journalism degree for cryin out loud. (Not that it’s ever made a huge difference.) You know what one of the first things I cut out of my life right after I graduated was? Watching any kind of news broadcast or reading any news outside of the occasional YouTube video or article from an independent website. Even then, I take a lot of it with a grain of salt. Please, do yourselves a favor this holiday season and in life and turn the TV off, stop listening to the bobble headed idiots on morning radio, put the newspaper down, and go outside for some fresh air. Screw politics. To Hell with what the Kardashians are doing now. Fuck COVID. Let the Chinese do whatever they’re going to do today. Ignore Trump entirely. Just go get some fresh air and appreciate the world around you. You’re gonna be so much better off for it.

Let’s talk about that whole “being unemployed” thing for a few.

This is not a dis on people with jobs. We all gotta do what we gotta do. Love ya for it.

Personally, if I never set foot in an office again to work, it’s not gonna hurt my feelings. I’m productive from right here at home. Yes, I’m struggling right now because no one sees my value. I can write. I know I can. I have yet to land a writing gig. Yes, I know what’s on my résumé It says I’ve been beaten more times than your college baseball team. But it doesn’t say a thing about me or what I’m capable of. Iowa Workless Defamation doesn’t see it. The locals aren’t hiring for anything I want to do and finding a remote job is like… Geez, I can’t even come up with a good comparison any more because it pretty much sucks!

Yes, I would love to have a “career” again. Quite honestly, being a stay-at-home dad is starting to feel a little like freeloading. This is not exactly fulfilling my life purpose or seeing my mission as a lightworker out, but it’s not horrible, either. I would love to be bringing in some money for roof repairs, a new vacuum cleaner, or whatever else comes up next. I mean, four kids. It’s always something.

LOL! Did I mention that Ko-Fi link? https://ko-fi.com/jeffcraigmile

People whom I wish to give much credit this year. Thank you friends, family, and Earthly teachers:

First Off, Thank you Heather Craigmile, loving wife and mother of our four kids. (No links.) She’s shy. Sorry folks.

Here’s a list of some of my friends on Instagram in no particular order:

  • Laura DiBenedetto: @lauraldibenedetto
  • Shane: @thespiritofthecosmos
  • Sharon: @candidly_sharonh
  • Andrea Garris: @a.l.garris
  • Dr Julia Colangelo @drjuliacolangelo
  • Alana Weinberg: @healwithalana

I had to leave a few people off for privacy reasons. And if I left you off, please know I still love you! Thank you!

Expanding Friends Group

The Six Habits by Laura DiBenedetto.
Talking about Goodness today.

One of the components of Goodness in The Six Habits includes things such as expanding your group of friends to include more positive, like-minded people. Other sources have said, “Your tribe is your vibe (and vice versa.)” Following that example, I’ve been reaching out more.

For example, I’ve been following Shane Hawk, aka The Spirit of the Cosmos on YouTube and Instagram for a while now. Shane is a gifted oracle, shaman, tarot reader, comedian and all-around great guy. Please don’t take my word for it, go check it out for yourself: @thespiritofthecosmos and on YouTube at The Spirit of the Cosmos. He’s been doing a lot more pick-a-card and oracle card readings. I can’t recommend him enough. I comment on Shane’s videos and we chat a little on Instagram.

Another example is the Facebook groups I have found myself in as of late. I’ve joined four different RPG related groups. So far, all of them have been very helpful and encouraging.

My next example, also in the RPG category is Ms Kelsey Dionne of the Arcane Library. She’s been coaching me a bit via email as I get back into writing adventures for Dungeons & Dragons and other tabletop RPGs. I’ll link her info and talk a little more about the Arcane Library on my gaming blog. I have been inspired by Kelsey and Beth Ball, both of whom recently became full time writers.

I belong to a lot of different communities. I have a lot of different people I resonate with. I used to cringe at the word “diversity,” but now I embrace it. Not just on social media, but everywhere. Really I’m richer for the experience. I’m a pretty eclectic guy.

I’ll throw out one more example before I go. I watch a lot of YouTube while I’m at work. I watch or listen-to upwards of a dozen or more different YouTubers ranging from LoA to Philosophy, conspiracy journalism to Dungeons & Dragons, and channeled messages to documentaries about Mars and on and on… I have listened to David Icke, Kelsey Dionne, watched Taufledermaus shoot holes in stuff and Daniel Scranton channel all in the same hour. Nikola Tesla and Rupert Spira all in the same hour will pretty much leave you drooling in all likelihood. Some of the stuff I like is really deep. Other things a lot more lighthearted. I recommend it all. And we haven’t even talked about the warped circus that is my sense of humor. Lol! My point here is, if it will raise your vibration, try it out. Namaste.

Two Days of Working from Home!

I just spent night number two of working from home. I love it! I’m not sure if it will last, but it would be pretty cool if it does.

Admittedly, one of the days at home was because someone at the office caught the Icky Cough-Coughs. My oldest decided to give the thing a Doc McStuffins name. I’ve adopted that term. I hope whomever got ill recovers quickly.

If there has been an upside to this plandemic, it has taught me that working from home is so much more preferable to working in the office. It has definitely approved my meager attendance. It’s a lot easier when I’m in pain to crawl across my basement and log in than drag myself to the car and shlep all my gear around the building into the office.

I AM so happy and grateful now that I am my own boss. And that is my affirmation today. Well, every day, really. It’s most assuredly manifesting.

Feelin boss today!

I AM my own best boss and favourite employee. Another affirmation that adorns my vision board and my affirmations list. This is part of the Acceptance piece of The Six Habits. I can’t recommend it enough. It’s also a pretty big component to LoA, or more specifically, the Law of Vibration.

Acceptance is a key Habit.

For those who might not be familiar yet, feeling, or even being in the moment as if you were is the Secret. I’m learning a lot of LoA hinges on mindset, fairly high vibration, and living in the moment. Not trying to brag, but my last couple of days have been pretty phenomenal. I hope yours have, too.

The best part is, feelings don’t cost anything. You can be in a great mood for absolutely free. And money can’t buy happiness, but it can sure as heck buy a lot of things that make me happy. Happy my family is taken care-of, happy to be reading, happy to be watching, happy to be traveling… the list goes on for about ever. So why not be happy now?

Have a beautiful now moment all day.

Presence Today

Pets are pros at Presence. Ever just sit and stare at your pet or pet your animal for a long time?

I choose to talk about Presence today. It is one of the Six Habits in Laura DiBenedetto’s book, The Six Habits. If you want to know more about it and would like to read the book, the link for it on Amazon is here: The Six Habits. The audio just came out too, by the way.

Presence is in short, all about mindful presence. Can you be in the room and be fully focused on what is going on in the room? It’s not as easy as one might imagine, especially in these modern times when we have numerous distractions- TV, radio, and the biggest attention-sucker ever- smart phones.

THE SIX HABITS by Laura DiBenedetto
Practical Tools for Bringing Your Dreams to Life.

Then there are the internal distractions. How often do you catch yourself thinking, “I wish I was anywhere but here?” Or my favorite, “I wish I was home right now,” while I’m at work. Sometimes, my mind wanders about 200 miles northwest of my current location, in a nice forested area, with a lake and a view of the mountains, within driving distance of the Pacific Ocean…

But the catch is, can you bring yourself back? Can you be fully on top of your game at work? Can you listen to the kids telling you about some video game character or a YouTuber they’ve discovered? Sometimes it’s hard. My email, especially ads from dice companies, is way more interesting than either thing I just mentioned.

My favorite example was the other day at a restaurant. This woman was at the table across from us with her family of six. My kids know, and my wife is usually aware of the rule, phones get put away at the dinner table. My guess is, the nice lady across from us did not have that rule at her house, or that phone call must’ve been pretty important.

Meanwhile, her husband was trying to wrangle the kids, all of whom were probably 10 and under, squirrelly as most kids are, and wiggling, wriggling and monkeying around as most kids do. The guy looked absolutely miserable. That phone call lasted most of the meal. I’d probably have said something had she been my wife, but… Hopefully they sorted that out afterwards.

Husky pup. Much more adorable than an Excel spreadsheet. I mean, seriously. Please email me for photo credit..

My other example, and this one is purely on me, is work. You think Instagram is far more amusing than my job? Spreadsheets and boring emails vs cute pictures of husky pups, kittens, bunnies, spiritual stuff, conspiracy stuff, and so on… I can get distracted very easily. The trick is coming back to the present moment.

How much more productive am I when I’m fully present? It’s pretty shocking how much I can really get done when I have my eye on the metaphorical ball. Would I rather be blogging? Yeah. Or really doing anything besides pouring over line upon line of dispatches and crunching numbers. UFOs, ETs, and things coming and going from other dimensions are way more entertaining to talk about.

Here’s the best part. Coming back to joy. I mean, if I’m more productive at work, maybe I finally get promoted or a pay increase. That keeps the family happy, right? And failing that, I get all of my actual work done and can dip out for a few and look at the latest dice offers in my personal email. Or, I can get everything set for the night and keep an eye open for driver requests while I write a blog article. Tee heehee. (Not that I ever do that.)

The same is very true at home. If I’m fully centered on my family and listening to them, I hear about their day at school. I hear about how my wife’s work went. (Yeah… the Co-la-ro-lala-nala-vir-usla is a very ugly topic here with teachers in Iowa right now…) I get to actually enjoy dropping some advice or bringing the topic around to something more interesting. Although my family’s thoughts about the Ninth Dimensional Arcturian Council are for another post. But it’s nice being a husband and a dad when life throws me a chance to be both. And there’s plenty of time to hang with the cats and write blog articles afterward. (Grin.)

Have a beautiful now moment.

Photo by James Wheeler on Pexels.com

How to Rebel Energetically (in 2020.)

In my last couple of articles, I covered how I have this sort of existential dissonance going between my own personal code of ethics and this job that I need to feed my family. Now, I could express this as a philosophical or even a straight math equation, but I intend to explain it very plainly.

Photo by Ju00f6rn Sommer on Pexels.com

Family comes first. Then my own physical needs. Then my ethics and spiritual needs third. Although technically the well-being of my family is one of my core values, so we could say I’m still heeding the call. But the two things that still get to me are the fact I’m serving an industry I despise and I’m stuck in a soulless cubicle all night watching my dignity degrade as I pour over spreadsheets and emails for hours.

Let’s make sure to mention service to self and others. It is extremely important. Not only are you keeping yourself happy, loving yourself, taking care of yourself, etc, but you’re taking care of your loved ones, and possibly neighbors and even community as well. Love is a key component to fulfilling one’s purpose. It’s called the language of the Universe. Send those super positive vibrations out there.

Writing, designing this blog and tabletop roleplaying games are my side gigs. Which I fully intend to have become my main focus. I’ve been at this for almost four decades now in one way or another. Yes, they’re fun hobbies but they’re going to become more. Yes I enjoy spending time on all three. Yes, there is “joy” in enjoy. Thank God.

Right there is the answer. Joy. Lots of it. TONS of it! If you want to fight back against the matrix (or whatever you want to call it,) you have to fill your heart with joy and love! Sounds a little silly to those who haven’t been in the spiritual community for long, but I find it to be very true.

Where Attention Goes, Energy Flows.

See, when you focus your attention on what you love doing, your energy goes there. Your vibration goes up, sometimes exponentially. Most importantly your joy comes forth. Joy! Happiness! Joy is one of the greatest energetic expressions in the entire Universe. If you want a systemic combo breaker, that’s it.

If anyone tells you otherwise? Tell them to go jump in the lake (or some other catchy phrase.) Once a person stops conforming to all these rules and norms created by a society, corporation or government who cares not for anyone’s well-being short of their own, it really eats the governing body. It tears at them. They get a little taste of what it’s like to watch their grasp slowly slipping away.

That said, don’t go flipping your boss the bird and laughing your way out of the office just yet, family. Again, the number one priority is greatest and highest good. So, take care of self and family. Still plenty of joy there, undoubtedly, but sometimes you have to keep the thing you despise around just long enough to really dig into the thing you love and find joy. Soon enough joy becomes greater.

Next time around, a discussion of Presence. A challenging habit to master, despite a simple name.

Solo of Fortune

I say I’m just playing the 3D game and it’s going to be overcome.

Was the name of my guild on World of Warcraft. I took a fair amount of grief for that one. It’s no coincidence that it’s tied to Cyberpunk 2020. And again, this isn’t my gamer blog, oddly enough.

A “Solo” is a mercenary, soldier or street samurai who primarily operates on his own or with a small group of people in the Cyberpunk Game. There was actually a supplement for the game called “Solo of Fortune.” I resonate with this as a light warrior, which is just a slightly more aggressive way of saying I’m a lightworker.

Solo of Fortune
Screenshot from Fandom

Please, bear with me. I’m not a violent person. By no means am I advocating violence in the real world with any of this. My goal is to demonstrate my current attitude and outlook on life. Please, for goodness sake- be kind, be gentle, and be nice to one another out there in the real world.

CP2020 is a game. Cyberpunk, specifically “punk” is an attitude. Anyone remember the 80’s? Remember punk rock? Yeah. It’s about being rebellious. It’s about being anti-system and pro freedom. It’s about being very loudly non-conformist. It’s individual expression aimed at the collective. It’s becoming what 2020 is all about. I mean, for real. Look at the news. Look outside.

I hit a dilemma in life, as I said in my last entry. Try to fit in and feed my kids, or shuck the whole thing aside, quit my job, and rebel. It’s burning inside my brain even now. It’s a good thing I love my family more than I hate my job. But mark my words, I’ll be out of that place in a nanosecond if something solid in line with who I really am comes along.

I’m an old Solo. I’m an old warrior who is not done fighting. I don’t fit into a tight little corporate package. Working for the oil industry no less. (Barf!) But- it pays most of the bills. Some people say I’ve sold my soul. I say I’m just playing the 3D game and it’s going to be overcome. It’s all temporary.

Law of Attraction, Law of Vibration, Law of Balance. Universal laws have come into play. I’d say I need a lawyer, but that’s not very ‘punk. I’m a virtual badass armed with everything I’ll every need to navigate the 3D world, and as Ralph Smart would say, “we ain’t even had breakfast yet.” I’m just getting warmed up.

Here’s truly how to beat the system in 2020. Raise your vibration! Raise it so high not a single dark anything can touch you. Find your joy! Find your passion! Live the dream! Live in the vibration of that dream every day and work hard until it becomes the real deal.

More to come on this. A lot more. No quitting. No giving up. And before I start sounding like a pro wrestler, see ya soon.

Cup Overflowing

I fill my cup with love. My cup overfloweth.

Without getting into a lot of serious details, I had a pretty rough night at work. And I was really upset at the time. I’m down to aggravated, maybe even annoyed now. It’s getting better. (Lol, sorta…)

I sat down to meditate and my guides gave me a few of things to go on. First, it’s all temporary. Everything. Every last minute. There’s better things to spend the energy on.

Second, it’s all about polarity right now. This is just another one of those incidents that is set in motion for a reason, possibly as a test. Then the guides dropped a tough one on me.

“Let go,” they said. “Trust.”

Yeah… Do they know how hard that is?

Last, my guides gave me a mantra to go on throughout the other 30 minutes or so that I was with them in meditation. “I fill my cup with love. My cup overfloweth.” Sounded somewhat Biblical. Wouldn’t be the first time.

But I have said it about a million times in my head now. I’m even smiling when I think of it. I have to believe this has all happened before elsewhere and it will have a happy outcome.

I fill my cup with love. My cup overfloweth.

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