Freedom Day: December 2022 Edition

I’m still wrestling around with that first RPG, book, manifesto, or something written to make money. (*Okay, maybe less the manifesto. That sounds a bit ominous.) Still, between the growing anxiety around failure and my recent discovery of my own really prominent social anxiety, I’m on the struggle bus. Feedback is very unwelcome at this time in my life. Like, nervous breakdown or would-rather-be-set-on-fire unwelcome.


It’s time to unpack and decompress.

First, let me say THANK YOU for being here and supporting my blog. I appreciate it. You are all the best. Happy Holidays.

December is going by at a rapid rate. It seems like yesterday was the middle of October or something. I blinked and autumn vanished. I dunno if that’s happening for everyone, but time seems to be warped for me.

I’ve been pretty preoccupied with the #ttrpg sphere and the #ttrpgcommunity especially on social media. Maybe not the most healthy thing, but I have some time on my hands. May as well, right?

Looking for money in all the wrong places.

Where do you look after you’ve checked under the couch cushions, under the bed, around the driveway and all down the sidewalk? Being a former custodian, I know other places, but it’s dishonorable to check in another scrounger’s lot. I’ve got a couple of other options.

The government route is not going to hot yet. No hearing date set yet. Guess it gives me plenty of time to have a convenient-but-not-fatal-accident. Maybe they’d finally believe that I’m as messed up as I say I am. (Nervous chuckle.) They might finally believe I’m as crazy as I say I am.

As an aside, when we say there’s a mental healthcare crisis in the US? We’re not kidding around. It started clear back in the 1980’s when good ol’ Ronald Reagan opened up all the mental institutions and kicked most of the occupants out. It’s all gone downhill from there. More and more psychologists are abandoning ship every year. Social workers are just plain giving up. There’s a constant balancing of the scales between the pay/benefits and the amount of bullsh 🦆t they’re willing to put up with. Meanwhile, record numbers of people are turning up with depression, PTSD, ADHD, various addictions and other serious psychological issues.

I’ve monkeyed around with Fiverr and Ko-Fi with less-than-sterling results. my Ko-Fi is still up in anyone is interested in donating to the site or my family. Fiverr is… interesting. Not sure I’m scratching the right niche over there.

Other “professional” career finding sites tend to want a monthly membership fee and I still end up doing the legwork myself. Where I’m from they call that a “scam.” Not to mention all of the add-on services some of these folx offer. I mean, cute idea, but is it worth all the money? I have doubts.

I’m still wrestling around with that first RPG, book, manifesto, or something written to make money. (*Okay, maybe less the manifesto. That sounds a bit ominous.) Still, between the growing anxiety around failure and my recent discovery of my own really prominent social anxiety, I’m on the struggle bus. Feedback is very unwelcome at this time in my life. Like, nervous breakdown or would-rather-be-set-on-fire unwelcome.

The RolePlaying Game Scene.

I know I talk about a lot of “Old Grognard” stuff on this blog. I used to somewhat take offense to being referred to that way. Yeah, I’m old, white, male, and people presume I’m cishet since I have kids. But it’s all in the attitude.

I pretty much take offense to being called an “Old Grognard” in the TTRPG space because I’m nothing like what most of those guys are considered. The reputation of the Old School Renaissance/Revival/Rehashingthesamecrap/re-whatever-it-is-this month. The Old Grognard crowd is declining into stale, bitter, (mostly) old white guys who take offense to everything and anything not-them. It’s really sad that the poor attitude is evident on and off the gaming table.

I’m pretty much staying away from the old grognards from now on. The bitter old crones of the OSR can segregate and isolate themselves from the rest of the TTRPG scene if they’d like. Some well-meaning people tried to warn me early on not to defend those guys. I understand now. Message received.

One Dungeons & Dragons, the newest edition of the world’s most famous RPG is in the works. For an edition that Wizards of the Coast says isn’t an edition, they’re doing a marvelous job of rehashing the same crap we’ve been debating about for over four decades now. They should be proud of themselves. The whole new generation of D&D players that came in under 5E get to be blessed with an edition change that polarizes DM and player alike.

The sad irony is there seems to be more drama in the industry and outside the game than what normally goes on at the table. I guess it’s always got to be something, right? I mean people interacting with one another in any setting, much more so on social media, is going to attract a good amount of drama over something. It’s unavoidable. I think humans are just wired that way.

I’m in the process of reevaluating what I want for content here on the site. I was leaning more old school up until a couple of months ago. I was on a serious Power Rangers RPG kick until we lost Jason David Frank in real life. I’m mulling over several options.

Somebody mentioned a thing called “#Dungeon23” which is designing of a megadungeon one day, one room at a time in 2023. (*More in-depth article coming up before New Year’s.) I’m considering it for a series on the site. I’m contemplating which game system to use, too.

Welcoming the Jolly Holipocalypse.

It’s the holiday season. Soon the kids will be out of school along with my wife. Food, presents, video game gunfire and explosions will abound. I’ll be thrilled to get some writing done after everyone goes to bed most nights.

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy Christmas as much as the next person. Since I embraced my spiritual journey along “New Age” lines, I’ve also noticed the holiday is very consumer-oriented, commercialized, and not as much fun as it used to be. At least the kids have fun. My wife enjoys cooking, family time, and mushy holiday movies with us.

Admittedly, part of the loss of joy is adulting. Being unemployed for almost a year and a freakin half doesn’t help. (Guilt issues.) Some of the childhood magic is pretty much gone by the time one hits 50. I really dig the peace on Earth, good will toward humans vibe. I’m hoping for a gentle snow with big flakes on Christmas Eve so I can watch out the window while I drink hot chocolate. There’s something about those big flakes hitting the ground in almost absolute quiet that just exudes calm and relaxation.

Lots of love for anyone working retail. I honestly don’t miss the holiday chaos. It’s all peace on Earth right up until the last minute shopping rush hits. I went into Target the other day. <shudder> It was packed on a Wednesday, middle of the day. I damned near ran screaming from the joint. And the days after Christmas are almost worse with all of the returns.

I hope all of you have a wonderful holiday season.

I love all of you. Have a good month of December. Take care. Thanks for stopping by. Gaming content resumes tomorrow.

Author: Jeff Craigmile

I'm a tabletop role-playing game writer and designer from Des Moines, Iowa. I'm the father of four boys and human to three cats.

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